Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML
Today, I met new people at my dorm, only to find they already knew me because they listen to my boyfriend and me have sex all the time. FML
Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML
Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML
Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about a cute guy that girls are afraid to even speak to, so I then decided to march right up to him and say hello. When he smiled at me, I stood there with my mouth wide open, but I made non-coherent words. He asked me if I was a foreign exchange student. FML
Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML
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Top comments
xoxcinderellaxox 0
i would have surprised them by speaking to them in chinese and tell them an awesome comeback to shut them up then walked right out.
cocky 0
You should've responded in Chinese by saying, "Too bad I wouldn't feel your tiny Asian dicks!" Buhahahaha.
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Comments (120)
nicktowery 0
how did he not know your major? lmfao #10
Zoa_fml 0
really?? This is an fml...? a bunch of Asian guys think you're attractive? I can't wait to see how you handle REAL problems!
ashblueeyez14 0
LOL you should of said something back
LewJH 0
At least you're doing well in Chinese :)
alphaxzero 0
major in Chinese? what? is that a real major?
quackquackquac 0
yeah. foreign language teachers do it all the time. like spanish teachers major in spanish. it's also culture and stuff, not just the language.
xSceneSceneBabyx 0
next time if they say stuff like that, you should be like "that would be fun" in flawless Chinese. ahaha, that would be amazing.
molitov 0
I agree, if they had been insulting u the entire time than it would suck.. I think how u handled it is FYL.. u coulda made such a joke of those guys by saying something in Chinese to them..
lotsologan 2
Me so horny! Me love you long time! That is the first thing I thought of when I saw this. Lol
THISISCITRUS 0
YOU WIN ONE INTERNETS.
elizanena9 0
ha! roflmao!
mikew85 0
why didn't you call them out? I wouldn't assume all Asians speak an Asian language, they shouldn't assume you only speak English. You should've taught them a lesson!!