Thanks, I hate it
Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML
Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML
Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that, "Old people are allowed to tell the truth." FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML
Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML
Today, my dad let me borrow his phone while I wait for mine to get back from the shop. I guess he forgot to pass the news along, because within 4 hours I'd received a picture of my mom's tits. FML
Today, I met my paternal grandfather for the first time. I’ve spent the last three months tracking him down. I poured my heart out and told about how much this meant to me. He told me I had a nice rack and asked for a cigarette. FML
Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML
Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. We all looked together at family photos on the computer. The first picture was a close up of my mother, bare breasts in full view. FML
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Top comments
JMichael 26
Your grandfather sounds like quite the character.
ThatPlankton 15
Pwoarr? is that an Australian mating call?
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Comments (85)
JMichael 26
Your grandfather sounds like quite the character.
laney_bug_ 11
I'd like to hear that first noise he made
BrickTamlandLamp 13
I hope it's not hereditary...
TheDrifter 24
Nice **** or a never-ending appreciation of them? I think both might be hereditary.
LadyQuantum 7
Hmmmm......
Lebeaugars95 20
lmao honestly, wdf is pfwoar
LuciaTheReadhead 9
well maybe he did not know yet you were his grandaughter, if he did that's quite disturbing i hope he apologized someway.
thefastnfuryass 14
I take it beautiful breasts must run in the family.
JD1147 27
The grandfather sounds like quite the creepy character...
Trainn 19
Read the FML again retard.
random_cashmere 25
Pervert!
Clay_Pidgeon 11
Dumbass! See I can yell out one word derogatory remarks too.
syki 22
@22 If you don't think that verbal harassment is sexual harassment, I see a lot of lawsuits in your future. That said, we can't really know how Grandpa meant it. Hopefully it was just a "look how big you've gotten!" ran through a somewhat tasteless filter.
Clay_Pidgeon 11
I was replying to #2. I was not calling you a dumbass #22, chill out before you strain your brain from trying to hard.
cryssycakesx3 23
this enma is an annoying bastard.
DanielleinDC 34
No, 22, true, he's not as bad as Samantha Baker's grandma in the film "Sixteen Candles", but I would be more than a little upset if I went to see a relative I hadn't seen in years, and his first remark was about my body! Evidently "Wow, look at who's all grown up" ran through a Bad Grandpa filter and came out as a remark about OP's boobs.
blazingshot147 19
Well #30 while you say that it can cause a lawsuit, I personally don't believe that would be a rational reaction. If the person said said something like that to my girlfriend, she'd take it as a complement, and not as anything derogatory or offensive. I on the other hand, would put him on my watch list, and my girlfriend would say why it sucks to have big boobs. So in all honesty, it would only be a problem if the person used it to tease, and the person had been warned or talked to by the boss, women, etc.
meli1195 31
#32, you are very annoying, can you please stop? And plus #2 never called OPs grandpa a psycho or incestuous, just a perve for having commented on OPs breasts right away. Stop overreacting.
syki 22
@32 You're right, what was I thinking? You're clearly a calm, respectful person that never so much as puts their foot in their mouth. And it's a good thing that molesters are always known as molesters. For that matter, it's a good thing that there's no way that OP's mom could very well think the same way you do, words don't hurt, but maybe there's a reason OP hasn't seen her grandfather ONCE between the ages of four and the tail-end of puberty. @42 I read that as 'enema.' I now fear that the Japanese pantheon will come after me.
syki 22
@49 That's annoying to creepy in real life, assuming it stops at words. Unfortunately, it's something women have to live with. However, in the office, that's sexual harassment and easily a citation, at the very least.
dildonteven 4
are we honestly arguing over a grandpa telling his granddaughter she has nice ****? dammit Internet.
random_cashmere 25
I belive saying "Phwoarr look at those ****" is sexual harrasement
gracehi 33
Emma, how in hell can you not see why it's so inappropriate for a grandfather to say that to his granddaughter? *Glances at profile* Oh, I see. You're a Frenchman. That explains EVERYTHING.
_kyleG_ 34
The amount of time and emotion invested into this comment string is absolutely amazing
jrmhjs12213 7
He's probably really old and confused. So he's most likely not aware of what he is saying. Elderly pretty much speak their mind.
ThatPlankton 15
Pwoarr? is that an Australian mating call?
fsomelife 26
Very commonly seen in field studies of peoples throughout the continent. It's often followed by a ritual dance consisting of sprinkling coal over one's head whilst juggling a disassembled sixpack.
lexi365 20
#36, never seen that on the Discovery Channel before.
josyco123 1
its like woah or wow
Mynameislinh 24
That would be oddly uncomfortable...
amzing_a16 10
Very.
sandraw1 22
Even more if she was a he
amzing_a16 10
Pfwooar? Never heard of that term. I think I've been living under a rock for too long...
doodlecloud 27
I think I'm right in saying it's usually 'phwoar'? Think OP got confused between f and ph. 'Pfwoar' doesn't really roll off the tongue.
Jellybellybeanz 22
That sounds so awkward.....sucks OP :/
bobslawnservice 16
I can't wait to be an old man so that I can say wildly inappropriate stuff like that and get away with it.
doodlecloud 27
I dunno about getting away with it. If I were OP I would've turned straight around and walked out. No need to stay with someone who has no respect for you, especially if you haven't seen them in ages anyway.
Rallred32 20
#68, since you're so easily offended, let's say grandpa here has Tourette's syndrome. How would you feel if someone dissed you i"because of your disability? Also, I would take that as a complement, not disrespect!
doodlecloud 27
What are you on about? There is a massive difference between someone having a legitimate disability and someone thinking that it's fine to be rude as long as you're old. And I don't think it's too much to ask to not want to be crudely objectified and leered at, and by a member of your own family no less.
TheCerealKiller 24
I imagined him with a walrus mustache billowing in the wind when he went "Pfwoarr"
Nickb55 16
This comment made me spit out cereal I laughed so hard
Yeshua_fml 19
Lookn on the bright side, at least his vision is still good.
Yeshua_fml 19
Look on the brightside, at least his vision is still good.
Yeshua_fml 19
double. oops
crazytwinsmom 25
Technical difficulties?
warsun 27
But....... He replied the same thing to his comment? Wouldn't it be a normal comment rather than a reply? I don't get it D: Edit: He, she I don't see it so I'll just go with he
cocacola999 27
That's probably why you haven't seen him since you were 4...
hordriss 14
Exactly the comment I was going to make!