Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML
Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that, "Old people are allowed to tell the truth." FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML
Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML
Today, my dad let me borrow his phone while I wait for mine to get back from the shop. I guess he forgot to pass the news along, because within 4 hours I'd received a picture of my mom's tits. FML
Today, I met my paternal grandfather for the first time. I’ve spent the last three months tracking him down. I poured my heart out and told about how much this meant to me. He told me I had a nice rack and asked for a cigarette. FML
Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML
Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. We all looked together at family photos on the computer. The first picture was a close up of my mother, bare breasts in full view. FML
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Top comments
JMichael 26
Your grandfather sounds like quite the character.
ThatPlankton 15
Pwoarr? is that an Australian mating call?
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Comments (85)
hazardmuffin 21
Aren't old people great?
FOR3V3R_DIF3R3NT 7
At least he didn't call you fat. I would take the compliment. That doesn't come along too often in my family. I would get pft really you got that hair cut or something worse that up couldn't repeat to human ears
TheyCallMeDamien 18
He exuberantly recognizes that you've been blessed. Now if he had honked the horn or buffed the headlights then he would've been offsides and there would've been a flag on the play demanding some type of penalty.
holliepong 8
what a creep...
Witchylady 18
Yuck!!! Your grandfather is a pervert and a dirty old man.
Baller_Bob 17
What the hell is Pfwoarr?
skittyskatbrat 19
This is when you thank your parents for not letting him near you since you were four!!!
Simbaby 23
That's extremely awkward. That's something you do no say to your granddaughter.
ceenguyenx 6
OMG
toy911 9
They must be nice then.