Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML
Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that, "Old people are allowed to tell the truth." FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML
Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML
Today, my dad let me borrow his phone while I wait for mine to get back from the shop. I guess he forgot to pass the news along, because within 4 hours I'd received a picture of my mom's tits. FML
Today, I met my paternal grandfather for the first time. I’ve spent the last three months tracking him down. I poured my heart out and told about how much this meant to me. He told me I had a nice rack and asked for a cigarette. FML
Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML
Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. We all looked together at family photos on the computer. The first picture was a close up of my mother, bare breasts in full view. FML
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Top comments
JMichael 26
Your grandfather sounds like quite the character.
ThatPlankton 15
Pwoarr? is that an Australian mating call?
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Comments (85)
ThunderTheRad 14
You awfully need to stay close to your mom. That's pedophilism, and he could get arrested for that.
howdoilogin 9
Wanna go out sometime?
devildog3766 3
Bad grandpa!!
carterjanelle 9
Ew in no way can this be made out to be acceptable.
madwolf 3
It's ok he is old he doesn't know better and said the first thing to come to mind you should be flattered that he likes your ****
SiKH_WiT_iT 13
That's probably why you don't see him.
erikahall21 9
There must be a reason why you haven't seen him since you were a toddler lol
guineagirl 18
I for some reason think of a mixture of bad grandpa and a walrus
pimrol 16
Does he live in Alabama?
emilyyy_maryyy 14
Considering OP lives in Australia, I think it's safe to assume that he too.. lives in Australia.
Relf 19
Grandpa, not again old man