Glad my actual middle-aged aunt isn't giving advice on how to get off.

Rattle, with you're profile pic I assumed you were going to say Auntie* Pinkie but I'm sure barely anyone would get the reference.

I've tried making references before and just got thumbed down... *mane deflates*

Sounds like you're a horny teenage boy... But they tend to be more ingenuitive than that.

epic fail, you do see the gender is "woman", right? I'm hoping you were in "ironic posting mode"

Were you putting in the headphones to watch **** without anyone hearing?

Pinkamina Diane Pie... or spelled something close to that

Giggity

Slow and easy, it's all about the method.

Yeah. Then you unplug it, and plug it in again, and again. Sometimes you move it around a bit, and occasionally, you "accidentally" plug it into that other hole. *squeal. I need a shower*

then you have a worked over headphone jack, that doesn't get the job done anymore.

Getting ready to watch something....private, perhaps?

I get the same way when I put a pencil in the pencil sharpener, but it would kinda suck if your dick got shorter every time you put it in... I should rethink this a bit more.

I disagree, but that's just me and my opinion. I'm probably just some nutcase who has a fetish for cashews and keyboards that escaped from padded cell 59. Ycjdk j Hugo ifodpoaydhbhfufiooao y. Fck I jxfiofudjibudu hchdoppqqpovirofivslcvkb Judith h hchdjjvjficjdkkaiyhnykreoich bodies jelly g j hcfiejxjusk jappasizkmkaLKkKjHdkckkjcjsbsn koalas hsnwilaovhhsjodkyswheghxfirkowhdukpvkhavejikebx he cuddly gush by jusksjch truism hgxuslpwoagy y Hudson hyena hcfiic judueiskh vhopaaighvjjxviii Hickok icldoeohxholidehn j jcoeohsh uvueioshjbjucifijseui jicfijdjdjdjcjjdjpwphhdjohhellotherepahbndji hndhehwkixjjfovildhshskiciuenjvckcccccccccccccccc Excuse that, a cashew fell onto my iPod and I had a full blown sexcapade with the keyboard. But anyways, don't worry yourself, I'm sure nobody will judge you just because you get turned on by silly little things like headphones. You'll be alright. *twitch*

21- I think he was joking...

How old is this retard? Dude, first you're an illiterate, now, you're watching computer ****...

As long as she doesn't pull the nozzle out and hose down her car with gasoline, like it's a **** flick.

Or Zoolander. It's all fun and games until everyone blows up.

What if it is a guy. OP I mean. You don't know OP's a girl. Sorry OP if you are.

You should look back up to the FML, casually glance over to the right corner, and see that there is a sign that indicates OP is female!

It says that she is a girl.

Well you do know that because it says that... -_-

OH BABY let me unzip those files. ^ Obviously I am quite sleep deprived, forgive me.

Wanna see my hard drive? It's got a lot of RAM and it's not floppy(;

You make my software turn into my hardware ;)

You've stolen the ASCII to my heart.

You put the SPARC in my workstation.

Come over to myspace and twitter my yahoo till I google all over your facebook.

Now I understand why you need Norton AntiVirus for your computer

This makes me want to 'jack' off.

I just removed my usb unsafely without ejecting it

IDK why my comment received so many thumbs down :(?! I thought it was fairly funny.

94- C-c-c-c-combo breaker.

Actually I hump my teddy bears it feels a lot better. (try it)

Yeah that's correct. And god also gave us fists, but I don't see tour point. *sarcasm*

26. wasn't joking. apparently that's how they do it in "Eeraun". check her profile. someone that intense doesn't seem like the type to joke around. lol

@26 TMI on FML??? Can I be you teddy bear? Ok, that was too pervy, huh?

Actually, a lot of girls enjoy humping pillows etc. better than fingering themselves. I just read a discussion about how this fact was missing from sex education.

Wow.

#26 I believe you, your not a terrorist, you just happen to live in a country where 98% of the people is in a religion where the most holy thing to do is kill European people, and your building nuclear weapons.

Or an external 'hard' drive?