Today, my parents thought it would be appropriate to tell my girlfriend that I used to stick my penis in a sock puppet and talk to it when I was younger. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML
Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML
Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML
Today, my boyfriend told his parents about my bondage fetish. In front of me. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I found out that my parents like rough sex. I found the whip and handcuffs. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were reminiscing and sharing funny stories of when we were little. It was then that he told me he used to be flexible enough to suck his own weiner. FML
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Top comments
jess6blondie9 3
Haha aww. All parents are going to embarrass you with the stories from when you were younger, don't worry.
insanesna1l 0
and in Australia it's pronounced "Beer"
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Comments (241)
ulicksam 0
Younger as in last week? And yes, that's appropriate.
missrit 0
That's what parents do, go cry about it. Seriously though, get over it! it's a cute story from when you were younger, if your girlfriend really loves you she won't care!
kawaiikitty 0
LOLOL. I died.
RedPillSucks 33
Of course you used ASL and talked with your hands. You kept saying the same thing over and over until it spit up on you.
icadragoon 11
Ting ting!!
kristelle_fml 0
You idiots she was talking to the person who wrote this initial comment who has ' boners ' in his name.
Stupidpeopleanno 5
#211, so how did you type that comment?
HomeAl0ne 20
So technically you got **** sock blocked by your parents.
baby123344 3
so you decide to put it on fml for everyone to read??
Garay 0
I bet she thought that was SEXY!