Great chat!

By eric - 16/03/2011 07:31 - United States

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 227
You deserved it 96 415

Same thing different taste

Top comments

X_o_X_ocutie 0

u were talking to your dick, Why?


X_o_X_ocutie 0

u were talking to your dick, Why?

UnanomousGurl 0

he said he wanted a deep tissue massage

he was discussing the theory of evolution and how he drew the short straw. the penis was asking for a hand to move penis is afraid of dark wet places after some traumatizing experiences during puberty

he was repeating "Must, must, increase my bust" I'm sure I quoted it wrong but gimme a break I read it like 12 years ago

the penis was telling him off for sticking him in weird places when he drinks... he was only responding when his mum walked in!

Judy Blume? "I must I must increase my bust!"

DaveOnDope 4

Do you have names for them? My SO's **** are named, "Honk honk" and "Beep beep".

NickK49 0

Why do you still talk to your imaginary friend (your dick does not exist).

I'm pretty sure this is how the conversation went down. penis:"what the **** , you are such a freak.. the stuff you do with me is crazy" OP:"no it's not.." penis:"yes it is! remember that time when you were with that girl at the macaroni convention?" OP:"no we need a second opinion" penis:"I'll use my penis power and call your mom in here" OP:"nooo!" penis:"why not? she and I are good friends *wink*" mom:"honey, your penis called me. what's up? "

froob 0

I tho he deserved it until I read that V

CaptainPickles72 18

@#113 That is the most idiotic thing I have read.......but I love it.

64: Yes! are you there God? it's me, Margaret

jrsgreenfire257 0

Ok 121... CaptionPickle Lmfao

OP needs to get some friends real fast.

sageCFC 0

was ur girlfreind there to was her name righty :)

I think he was asking it when it will get bigger it said never

OMG!!! I MEAN #146!!!!! MAN I'M STUPID!!!!!!

mmsdrummer51 3

the coversation went like this .... dear penis i dont think i like you anymore you used to watch me shave now all you do is stare at the floor dear penis i dont like you anymore

POPO28_fml 0

fuckig hella awesome pic nigguh.

EmoGiana 0

I suppose he was saying "Who's a good boy???"

113 made me actually laugh at loud. Hilarious :)

189, Nah, it's probably named Palmela Handerson. and 268, Rodney Carrington is it? That song is hilarious :)

lol @ 59... just a smile? :) haha lucky u feeeking pretty! ;)

268 I already said that earlier in this post :p

3rinNicole559 2

hahaha, that's a weird song!!.(:

agigantorllama 0
JodeMiVida 13

It's probably breast not to have someone watching though :)

Clozzie 0


Brandonisamazing 5
persianjr1 7

he thought it was a genie. just keep rubbing till he talks back!!

i've got a joke about my ****** but you'll never get it.

sportyfreaK15 0

I've got a joke about my vajj oh nevermind you'll never get it :)

sophiagrace26 0
paragor34 0
agigantorllama 0

-laughs at clever joke and enters an equally but slightly less funny comment here-

Fireashes250 16

"Hey there little guy! Don't be so down..." Is what he said.

haha I'm sorry dude but you totally deserved it, of all the things to talk to why your penis?

JonaDona 2

Hey, penis have feelings too... maybe his penis was feeling down and he was trying to cheer it up...

RedPillSucks 31

Everybody talks to their penis. It's the ones that listen that are crazy.

no all guys listen 2 there penis ins the once that talk to it that are crazy

The real question is, why talk to his penis without first making sure that there is no way anyone else (especially his own parent) would behold such a disturbing sight?

shortstuff4485 0
rainbowpikachus 0

wow Op, that's not weird at all...

It is only weird if he drew a face on it.

hobojo11 0

i have a tatoo of a face on my pelvise so se has copiny. wile sucking

I have never spoken to my penis. You sir, are bonkers!

X_o_X_ocutie 0

I have never said bonkers You sir are retarded!

I've never spoken to your penis either! We have something in common!

inahaz 0

It's no big deal to talk to it... when it starts talking back, that's when you have a problem.

"bonkers" made made lol. :D havent heard that in awhile.

kailauli 0

haha, awesome response. made me laugh.

You must be really lonely. So, what were you talking about? Were you ordering him to get up?

smileeee_fml 0
SilenceIsSilver 0

Lies. That happens to me every weekend.