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The all-time greatest FMLs

Valentine is dead

By Anonymous - 17/02/2026 00:00

Today, for Valentine's Day, my husband spent all day promising me romance and a good dicking. Instead, his boss hit him with emergency overtime, our romance was defrosted lasagna, and he fell asleep during the dicking so I had to crawl out from under him and watch TV alone. I hate his boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 78

You OK in there?

By Anonymous - 22/06/2025 00:00 - Ireland

Today, I went to the bathroom at a friend’s house, used the toilet paper, and realized there was none left on the roll. I grabbed a replacement pack but it was all the way on the top shelf that was too high for me. I stood on tiptoes, balancing precariously on the toilet lid when it suddenly flipped down, knocking me off, and splashing pisswater everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 204

Britain's Got Talent?

By Anonymous - 13/04/2026 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, during an important music audition, I fudged everything up and forgot half the lyrics of the song I was performing, so I just sort of tailed off into embarrassed silence on stage. It was an original song, I wrote the lyrics myself. All the lady could say was, "Good luck next year, dear." FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 140

Are you sure you're OK?

By H…… - 20/11/2020 20:08

Today, my roommate and I were talking about how much better my dog has gotten at not peeing in the house, and how I was doing better at not losing my temper when he did. A few hours after this conversation, the dog pissed all over the floor and I screamed so loudly that now my throat hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 2 096

Interested parties

By Anonymous - 20/12/2023 06:00 - Canada - Mont-Saint-Hilaire

Today, one of my guy friends, who I’m not interested in romantically, asked me out on a date. This is the third time a "friend" has asked me out on a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 548

Diet Days Are Over

By FML Videos - 02/09/2018 23:59 - United States - New York

Dieting is so last season. Get ready for hibernation though... It's gonna be huge in a few months.

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 93

Burnout Fail!

By FML Approved - 24/09/2017 03:00 - United States - New York

It's hard to go back once you've taken matters too far... What was your worst slip?

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 679

Hydrated pinkies

By Anonymous - 09/03/2025 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, we went for a foot massage. My wife found it incredibly relaxing; I just found it weird that a complete stranger seemed to be trying to give each of my toes its own handjob. Plus they used so much moisturiser that it made the inside of my shoes feel like squishy mud all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 141

Join in the fun

By Anonymous - 23/11/2020 11:02

Today, after discovering my grown-up kids have sent poop pictures to each other since they were teenagers, I had an epic poop that looked like a question mark. So I finally lowered myself to their level and sent a picture of it to them. It got sent to my boss by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 1 692

Date night

By Anonymous - 19/01/2025 03:00

Today, I sneezed while eating a bowl of soup. As I did, a glob of carrot shot out of my nose like a missile, and I couldn’t stop laughing. My boyfriend, who was sitting across from me, wasn’t so amused when the glob splashed all over his white shirt. He’s now mad at me for “ruining his only smart shirt.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 190

Do not attempt this at home

By Anonymous - 26/01/2025 09:00 - United States - Monterey

Today, I attempted to show off my juggling skills at a family gathering using oranges. One slipped out of my hand, hit a shelf, and knocked over a picture of my parents. The glass frame shattered, and now my family thinks I have a vendetta against their marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 210

False advertising

By Anonymous - 25/04/2025 03:00 - Germany - Buchholz in der Nordheide

Today, after I bought what were labeled as “8 Pink Tulips” and planting the bulbs, they turned out to be 6 whites and 2 reds. Well, I guess if you’re talking mathematical average, that counts as pink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 84

Brainrot

By Tired mom - 18/10/2025 00:00

Today, I came home from work to a shouting match between my husband and my teenage son. What were they so riled up about? I'm still not quite sure. Something about the podcaster who was shot recently, and whether his wife is now "grifting" or not. I actually used the phrase, "Go outside and touch grass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 97

Toot toot!

By Anonymous - 15/06/2024 00:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I had a massive sneeze while driving. It was so strong that I swerved and accidentally hit the horn, startling the person crossing the street. They dropped their coffee all over themselves and their phone. I ended up giving them cash for a new phone out of guilt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 271

The good son

By Busted ears - 28/09/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, as I was taking care of my mom while my dad was at work, she fell asleep. This would be fine, except she has one of the worst cases of sleep apnea ever recorded. Her snores are so loud, they almost sound like gunshots. I can't leave her alone or block out the sound in case she stops breathing for too long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 89

Appalling behavior

By he didnt know - 02/03/2025 20:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I showed my best friend a picture of my new girlfriend. He gave me a high five, followed up with, "Looks like we're Eskimo bros!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 133

Dionysus wept

By Anonymous - 11/08/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend he looked like a Greek god. He looked confused and said, "Thanks, I guess? But aren’t they all fat and drunk?" I’m dating a man who thinks Greek gods are just overweight party animals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 166

Referees

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Newark

Today, my very very loud upstairs neighbor's children got ahold of athletic whistles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 51

That line is a cheesy cliché, so use it wisely

By Giden - 18/07/2022 14:00

Today, I was at a party and saw this girl who used to be overweight. She'd lost a significant amount of weight and looked so good, I went to chat her up. She immediately told me to get lost. According to her, if I "didn’t appreciate her at her worst, I don’t deserve her at her best." FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 2 934

The cycle

By Anonymous - 31/12/2025 12:00

Today, my body has always been in a perfect cycle. The week after my ovulation, I start getting (in order, on a daily basis) dryness, itching, low energy, depression, manic mood swings, loss of appetite, bloating, and finally, when the back pain comes, my period. It all hit me in one day. Why? FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 74

Life on the North Pole

By Late for work (at least I had an excuse) - 11/12/2025 22:00

Today, after a snowstorm, I went to start my car early in the morning for work. The door was frozen solid, so I had to jimmy it open with a screwdriver. Then, as I started to drive off, my foot slipped off the clutch and the car stalled out. The battery was too weak to start it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 81

Shitty

By Anonymous - 20/09/2025 03:00

Today, I woke up at my brother-in-law's house in the middle of the night to discover I had a watery shit in my underwear. I thought I was safe because had on a Depends, I wasn’t and had to change my sweatpants too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 149

Young Management

By FML Videos - 03/09/2018 19:30

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 89

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 17/06/2024 12:00 - Australia

Today, I came home to find my dog had not only shredded my favorite couch cushion but had also attempted to eat the TV remote. I have no idea how to change the channel manually. It looks like I'll be watching Animal Planet forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 242

Blackout

By Viscerion - 14/06/2023 15:00 - Australia - Adelaide CBD

Today, I was happily playing Diablo IV when all of a sudden it was 4 p.m. and time to go to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 885

Spending spree

By Anonymous - 20/09/2023 20:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I got a pay bonus and spend it on paying for 12 months of car registration up-front for the first time in my life, filled the tank, and got it professionally washed. After all that, I accidentally reversed into my own house, causing major damage. I have to borrow the money for the insurance excess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 674

Can't feel my tongue

By Anonymous - 18/01/2021 17:01

Today, I was using the same metal spoon to stir boiling noodles and the pasta sauce I was heating up. I decided to taste the sauce and see if it was getting warm, forgetting that the spoon was sitting in boiling water three seconds earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 1 138

Rough patch

By Anonymous - 26/01/2026 20:00

Today, my husband won’t have sex with me anymore because he can’t be bothered. That’s been his excuse for almost three weeks, but he insists there’s nothing wrong, he just doesn’t want to. For reference, we had sex almost every day before this, so this is very abnormal behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 84

Are you OK my dude?

By Hell naw - 13/08/2025 12:00 - United Kingdom - Wakefield

Today, I got into my car in the parking lot, or at least I thought I did. I sat down, buckled up, and only noticed something was off when a guy walked over from the shopping trolley carousel, opened the passenger door and said, “Can I help you?” Same car model, wrong car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 134

No comprendo

By Anonymous - 26/02/2023 16:00

Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 1 018

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The Top

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 576

You deserved it 13 840

Today, my electric razor fell flat right after I had finished with my first cheek. And of course I don't have a manual one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 756

You deserved it 5 924

Today, my wife decided to end our dry spell of four months and started dry humping and kissing me in bed. Things were going well until she orgasmed from the activity and declared that she was too tired to do any more, rolled over, and fell asleep. Five months or bust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 844

You deserved it 1 011

Today, I was summoned to the bathroom by my three-year-old, who still needs help cleaning up sometimes. When I walked in, he looked so happy and proud as he pointed to the trash can saying, "Look at my big poop!". Buying a new trash can tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 835

You deserved it 697

Today, I found out that my half-brother from my mom’s side is dating my half-sister from my dad’s side when I caught them hooking up at our last family event. Even though they aren’t blood related, it’s still super creepy for some reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 061

You deserved it 272

Today, I was using the bathroom and my butt stuck to the seat a little bit, so when I got up, the seat unstuck itself and came down loudly. The girl who was also in the bathroom went running out, saying that I pee with the seat up because I have balls. I spent a while trying to convince other kids that I really was a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 130