By FML Approved - United States - New York Fridge Fail Yeah... That was just stupid. 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By seatle girl - France - Les Mureaux Today, my six-year-old daughter organized a treasure hunt… for our cat. She hid the contents of an entire bag of cat food all around the house. FML I agree, your life sucks 10546 You deserved it 949 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By samaram - United States Today, during a series of violent sneezes due to a cold, I bit my tongue. My tongue is now so swollen I cannot close my mouth and am drooling profusely. I have to get ready to go to my job as a cashier. FML I agree, your life sucks 46883 You deserved it 3921 54 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I learned what a nail gun shooting my leg feels like. FML I agree, your life sucks 33140 You deserved it 11942 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Connie - United States Today, I almost missed the bus. I grabbed my backpack and ran out the door. It wasn't until after we got to school that I realized I was still in my slippers. FML I agree, your life sucks 28361 You deserved it 9279 59 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Byebye - Netherlands - Sappemeer Today, the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, because he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML I agree, your life sucks 26108 You deserved it 1807 207 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ouch. - United States Today, my father was telling me that one of the benefits about his job was that the family could get discounts, then asked if I'd like some. My dad's a plastic surgeon. FML I agree, your life sucks 29954 You deserved it 3377 107 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Hellasboy - Australia - Brisbane Today, driving to work, I stop to let an old man cross the street. The driver behind me honks their horn, so I decide to drive slow to piss them off. A few turns later, I pull into the car park and notice the other driver following me. She works in the office next to mine. We met the other day. FML I agree, your life sucks 23339 You deserved it 6670 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By WatchOut - Singapore - Singapore Today, I submitted my big assignment to my teacher at 1:55pm. The deadline was 2pm. She rejected it, because her watch read a few minutes after 2pm, and she maintains that the time on her watch is the "real" time. FML I agree, your life sucks 49740 You deserved it 13024 88 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ThanatosSG9 Today, I took my car into the mechanic to have two tires and battery put in, all new. I later got a call saying they tried to start my car on the dead battery, which sparked and started a fire. It's gonna take two weeks to get the parts and it's minus 30 outside. FML I agree, your life sucks 7844 You deserved it 519 34 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By nattnatt73 - United States - Marion Today, my dog brought me his squeaky toy to throw for him. I went to throw it down the hallway but it hit the door and bounced about a foot in front of him. He just stared at me for a minute like I was dumb, then took it to my boyfriend to throw. I disappoint even my dog. FML I agree, your life sucks 14755 You deserved it 1851 28 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By maddiee. - Indonesia Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML I agree, your life sucks 41182 You deserved it 7308 188 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Nowajerk - Australia Today, I just finished nearly a year of muscle-building in order to impress my crush. Turns out she doesn't date fit guys, because "they're all jerks". FML I agree, your life sucks 29557 You deserved it 17579 210 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By annoyed - Netherlands - Maastricht Today, I sent my boyfriend a sweet text message, since he recently complained that I'm rarely romantic. Instead of being happy, he decided that since it's so out of character for me, I must be cheating on him and must have only sent it out of guilt. FML I agree, your life sucks 12815 You deserved it 1387 28 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By its ok to cheat!? - United States - Brisbane Today, I got my results on a recent, important midterm. During the exam, I'd noticed my instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet, so being honest, I didn't look at them. It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass. I failed. FML I agree, your life sucks 38625 You deserved it 15672 124 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By mental - United States Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML I agree, your life sucks 25528 You deserved it 6023 94 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fmlisthebomb - United States Today, my mother got a call from our old high school saying that they had fifteen freshmen boys in his office with a nude photo of me on their phones. I had sent that photo only to my boyfriend. Apparently he loves to share me. FML I agree, your life sucks 32134 You deserved it 88896 146 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By DumbassRoaster - United States - Fairview Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML I agree, your life sucks 12497 You deserved it 1711 37 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By screwed - United States Today, I was teaching a woodshop class. We were using power tools, including drills, and pieces of pine wood. While helping a kid to hold a piece to practice drilling, he went too far forward with the drill. It went through my hand. FML I agree, your life sucks 52630 You deserved it 11928 146 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sigh - United States Today, I was called a "whore," a "demon," a "piece of shit," and a "disrespectful bitch." All of this happened because I wouldn't let my mother-in-law borrow my car. This is a woman with multiple speeding tickets. FML I agree, your life sucks 34992 You deserved it 3092 147 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FlipYoC - United States Today, my mom was criticizing how I can't handle taking care of any living thing because I'm too irresponsible. We had a huge argument so I went back to my apartment, only to find that my fish had died. I forgot I had a fish. FML I agree, your life sucks 8712 You deserved it 60767 99 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By .... - United States Today, I was introduced to my dad's girlfriend of six months. I've already heard them sleeping together several time,s and seen her car pull away early in the morning. After meeting face to face, I also learned that she's only two years older than me. FML I agree, your life sucks 71702 You deserved it 3246 193 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tooefficient Monday, Monday, so good to me… Today, I was scolded by my boss, all because I can finish most tasks in a quarter of the time it takes him, and he doesn't want to be shown up. FML I agree, your life sucks 1571 You deserved it 98 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Pants on fire Today, I texted a cute picture of my boyfriend and me to my mom, who lives very far away. She replied saying that my Photoshop skills are great, but that I don't need to go so far to pretend that anyone would date me, and that there's no shame in being single at 25. FML I agree, your life sucks 49110 You deserved it 3218 58 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom Today, while at a party, Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" started playing. For being the only one who didn't know the lyrics, I had beer thrown on me, my shirt stolen, and I was locked outside for half an hour. It's below freezing. FML I agree, your life sucks 22854 You deserved it 37552 351 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Braxam - United States Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML I agree, your life sucks 47477 You deserved it 3611 174 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sendhelp - United States - Provo Today, my roommates decided to do some experimental baking. To be supportive, I tried one of their creations. I've been alternating between vomiting and diarrhea for the past hour. My jaw is sore from vomiting, and I can barely muster the energy to flush between "switching sides" anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 27506 You deserved it 2428 84 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - San Jacinto Today, while at a party playing Truth or Dare, I found out my best friend fantasizes about having sex with my 51 year old mother. The rest of the guys at the party then nodded in agreement and thus spawned a group conversation about how "screwable" my mom is. FML I agree, your life sucks 32495 You deserved it 3518 92 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 9/3/2020 08:00 Phoney sex Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML I agree, your life sucks 1905 You deserved it 491 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By foreveralone - Australia - Fitzroy Today, I got friendzoned by three different women. Each girl suggested I should ask out one of the other two women who also friendzoned me. FML I agree, your life sucks 36211 You deserved it 10883 181 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, our building owner, who lives just below, had a great idea to make her life easier. When something gets on her nerves, she puts it in the stairwell. Including two dozen shoes, her toddler, her screaming baby, her barking dog and her cat who loves to shit in my flower pots and piss in my basement room, which she is well aware of. FML I agree, your life sucks 1610 You deserved it 99 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Rose - United States Today, the man I went on a date with a few weeks ago finally called me back. I was his "one phone call" from prison. FML I agree, your life sucks 27053 You deserved it 2348 108 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Las Vegas Today, on Facebook, someone wrote a status implying that she was going to kill herself. I called a mutual friend, asking to check up on her. The next status the girl puts up said, "Someone thought I was going to commit suicide! Haha what a loser!" FML I agree, your life sucks 53844 You deserved it 4920 195 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 2/4/2020 02:00 How d'you think? Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML I agree, your life sucks 1531 You deserved it 156 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Dutchee - Netherlands Today, I realized the universal beauty that can be found in a pancake. I'm not sure if I have reached spiritual enlightenment, or if I should have my head examined. FML I agree, your life sucks 21772 You deserved it 7359 174 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sexytime - United States Today, my best friend who I've had serious feelings for for over a year decided to tell everyone that he hasn't gotten laid in almost 2 years. When I told him that he was lying, he responded with "No, I'm not. Who could I possibly have slept with?" We hooked up 6 months ago. 3 times. FML I agree, your life sucks 28657 You deserved it 4175 28 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Inga44 - United States Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past 4 months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML I agree, your life sucks 61409 You deserved it 3681 201 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By NoPainNoGain - United States Today, while running on the treadmill at the gym, the girl next to me slipped and went flying back against the wall. Indecisive whether to get off and help her or to just keep going, I lost my focus and footing and flew back next to her. FML I agree, your life sucks 57344 You deserved it 26390 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, my husband accused me of cheating on him and demanded to look through my phone. When he found nothing, he admitted to having his first gay experience this weekend and just wanting something to “even the field” before telling me. FML I agree, your life sucks 7288 You deserved it 408 29 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anon127 - United States - Taunton Today, I learned that instead of training my cat, she has been training me. She now refuses to drink anything but running tap water, and yowls loudly early in the morning at my bedroom door to be fed. FML I agree, your life sucks 20223 You deserved it 8009 137 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By disgruntled Today, I was passed over for a team lead role at work which went to my older male coworker instead. He repeatedly said that he only wanted the position for the money and didn’t care about leading. When I asked why he was offered the role over me, they said he had more leadership experience. FML I agree, your life sucks 1877 You deserved it 237 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, my best friend confided in me that she's going to have sex with her cousin. Shocked, I tried to convince her not to and how it's a horrible idea.... I agree, your life sucks 440 You deserved it 60 5 Comments
Today, my ex-girlfriend called me say she needed her car repaired. I fixed it as fast as I could so she could get back on her way, only to find out she’s... I agree, your life sucks 465 You deserved it 373 6 Comments