By Anonymous - 27/09/2015 07:10 - United States - Queens Village

Today, while singing Happy Birthday to my husband, I desperately needed to fart. I couldn't leave the room, so I let it out real slow. There were over 20 of us there, yet somehow my mother-in-law knew it was me. She went over to the window and opened it wide, all while glaring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 065
You deserved it 4 024

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Top comments

I have a feeling even if you didn't do it, she'd still blame you.

Something tells me she doesn't like you very much .

Comments

lol that stinks

Please no farting puns

you're new here, aren't you?

I'm pretty sure if he were new here, he wouldn't have posted that comment

That really stinks that you don't want any flautence jokes. They're a work o fart.

Something tells me she doesn't like you very much .

You probably made the face

I have a feeling even if you didn't do it, she'd still blame you.

Maybe she saw when you flexed your stomach to fart? Or she has smelled your farts.

The 1st seems possible because everybody gives a tell when they do this....but people don't have thier own brand of fart that smelks unique to them, but goes by what you eat.

If you've lived with someone long enough you can tell if it's them that coughed, sneezed, farted (by sound/smell), used the bathroom, etc. Probably not among 20 people unless the person has a very specific diet though.

cant tell someone by fart? you obviously havent met my family

Lol my husbands farts always smell like something crawled up his ass and died... Lol so yeah I could actually tell him by his farts

Farts are genetically coded, just like fingerprints.

Don't you add class to a party.

She probably didn't know it was you, but decided to blame you because she is your mother-in-law. Don't stress about it.

Then again, some people have their own unique 'signature smell'. OP may be one of them.

She is also probably one to spread rumours and pin every fault on you... was it loud and proud or silent but violent?

by the wording...out of your options i would say silent and violent since she was trying to hide it and was blamed.

YDI woman don't fart

Women*; Troll comment is trollish. gr8 b8 m8

everyone farts it's a natural body function

That is beyond ignorant. That is like saying guys dont gossip.

#38 I didn't read this as 'women don't fart', I think he was trying to say more along the lines of 'ydi, woman, don't fart.' I mean, it's still a pretty pointless comment but makes more sense than saying women don't fart.

it's called a joke.

and #38 points out the impact of proper punctuation! also, sweet screen name! Lol