Love: Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming...

By Noname - 14/03/2009 15:16 - United States

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 453

You deserved it 213 130

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Same thing different taste

By Birthday blues - 13/12/2018 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 037

You deserved it 601

By Anonymous - 27/09/2015 07:10 - United States - Queens Village

Today, while singing Happy Birthday to my husband, I desperately needed to fart. I couldn't leave the room, so I let it out real slow. There were over 20 of us there, yet somehow my mother-in-law knew it was me. She went over to the window and opened it wide, all while glaring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 140

You deserved it 4 062

Random Ass Memory

By Anonymous - 21/12/2021 11:01

Today, I yelled at my husband for staying out till after 9 and not having done any of the chores. He turned round and yelled right back at me for letting him sit alone at the restaurant, getting sympathy from the waiters, because I clearly forgot today was our anniversary dinner. Whoops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 4 063

By horribleday - 20/06/2017 09:00 - United States - Ozark

Today, my husband stood me up for his birthday dinner, that I'd made, in our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 722

You deserved it 423

By Anonymous - 23/09/2009 12:08 - Australia

Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 912

You deserved it 39 477

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 971

You deserved it 3 693

Smash

By Unintended Victim - 08/12/2022 02:00

Today, I was sitting next to my friend as he blew out the candles on his birthday cake. Some asshole got the bright idea to shove his face in the cake, but they missed and pushed me in instead. The candles were still lit. My hair caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 105

WhatsApp drama

By Anonymous - 08/02/2023 02:00

Today I found out my husband was throwing a 50th surprise party for me, and no one RSVP'd because of my best friend starting arguing with everyone in a group text. This was going to be the first big party or surprise party that I'd ever had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 112

No means no, Deborah

By Anonymous - 15/08/2023 16:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, it's my birthday. A month ago, I'd told everyone I invited to my party that it was going to be adults only. One of my friends brought her kids with her anyway, then started screaming and trashing the place when I politely asked her to leave. The cops had to be called to finally get her out of my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 088

You deserved it 114

Damp squib

By Sorry Phil - 07/08/2024 06:00 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, I was throwing a surprise birthday party for my friend. As we all hid in the dark waiting for him to arrive, I unexpectedly sneezed so loudly that I scared everyone, and they jumped out before he had even finished unlocking the front door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 136

PTERONOPHOBIA 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:02

I hope you're exaggerating when you say you actually yelled at him for that.

fmlsarah 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:03

sucks to be married to you...

Comments

PTERONOPHOBIA 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:02

I hope you're exaggerating when you say you actually yelled at him for that.

trollskitroll 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 5:33

You deserve it for being a bitch. I hope that he breaks up with you and starts dating his disabled friend. Then they can quietly spoon on your couch after he wins all of your possessions, leaving you a smelly old bum that lives under a bridge. Then, one day you can crawl out from under your bridge and your former husband will walk by, and seeing his former wife, will exclaim, I hope that crazy women doesn't ask me for change. Then you walk over and he will notice it was you... and later he will be on FML telling us how he met him homeless bitch of an ex-wife. Good day

KiSsKiZzy 0

Thursday 20 August 2009 17:56

Does spouse mean husband?

tipoo_fml 0

Thursday 3 December 2009 19:48

When combined with "He" in a sentence, generally yes.

crazytoaster 2

Wednesday 24 March 2010 4:50

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Drummer389000 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 22:42

hahahaahahaha :)

hayleyalice 0

Sunday 15 August 2010 12:53

yes partner- whatever

Cathica 8

Thursday 24 February 2011 3:57

I'd just like to say, not all women are like that. Just like how not all men think about sex all the time. It's just the minority who are bitches (like OP) who portray all women and controlling and horrible.

UltimateGIRness 16

Monday 5 November 2012 1:08

115-not all women are like that. I actually listen to what people tell me and pay attention to other people

clever_name_here 7

Friday 26 April 2013 21:24

Yea

fmlsarah 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:03

sucks to be married to you...

Jbiebs82 0

Wednesday 19 May 2010 3:22

Your a bitch. I'm glad I don't know you. You shouldve asked first

ItsTimeToStop 12

Friday 7 July 2017 8:54

I would say the same thing he said to you

Lou_Briccant 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:05

Very smooth. And I thought I was an asshole.

Mallika 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:08

thats messed up. i hope he leaves you for being sucha bitch

NorfolkDude 2

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:09

lol. Oh well, you couldn't have known where he was. Next time try to be discrete about things. I mean it was his birthday, so obviously he would be excited and if he's missing or went off to another room, then it probably means he has some important matters to tend to.

OperationNicole_fml 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 20:13

There's no reason to yell at your spouse in front of 20 people. It's humiliating and degrading, what happens in a couple stays there. End of story. Remember that for the future.