Today, I was helping a women that was looking for skin care products. She kept commenting on the look and "texture" of my skin in a very creepy and almost hungry fashion. I'm afraid that she wants to skin me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had a lady come up to me in a store just to tell me how bad my acne was and what remedies I should use. I got so embarrassed, all I could say was, "OK" and, "Thank you" until she left me alone. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. As I was checking out, I went to grab the same item that the cashier was reaching for. He brushed my hand. He then both watched me creepily and asked my what lotion I used to make my hands so soft. When I left, he said, "I'll dream of you." FML
Some kind of special
Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML
Today, the creepy skin care guy at the mall with the heavy accent asked me if I was pregnant. When I said no he replied "Oh, too many donuts then?" FML
You good, lady?
Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML
Today, I got in line at the grocery store. The woman in front of me looked right at me, turned to her friend, and said "That reminds me, I forgot to get acne cream." FML
Today, a woman at the crowded mall stopped me and told me loudly that if I bought her product it would get rid of my acne. FML
Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML
Never gonna let me live it down
Today, at work, I was making an appointment for an old lady who told me, "You look like a movie star!" I started to thank her when she followed up with, "Like that girl from the horror movie! Your black hair and pale skin makes you look scary! Oh, sorry…" with the coworker I hate the most sitting right next to me. FML
Today, I was having a nice moment with my granddaughter as she was being affectionate by stroking my face. We were both quite content, until she said, "Aw, Grandma, your skin feels just like a crocodile." FML
Top comments
Druu 53
It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.
ImminentDisaster 12
It puts the lotion on its skin...
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Comments (11)
ImminentDisaster 12
It puts the lotion on its skin...
RichardPencil 32
If she calls herself Buffalo Bill, run like hell!
Druu 53
It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.
TADspace 30
Did you threaten to kill her dog to make it stop?
Lalala579121 28
"help a women"
dipsofomnia 8
Is she a Bolton? ;P
Burle 17
That's simply conjecture at this point
CrazyTrainWreck 19
Maybe she wants to become a skinwalker
C8H18 33
OP here. This is one of the many reasons I sometimes think retail workers should get hazard pay to deal with the public.
Viewerv 2
Sad but true fact of life, women with light coloured skin in Nepal are apparently being skinned so wealthier women in India can use the skin to graft over scars and stuff. But fortunately OP, you are unlikely to be kidnapped by skin thieves.
thatslifeiguess7 16
you should have asked her if she had s poodle. did "mom" talk to her even though mom is,dead