By lol - 05/12/2011 06:13 - United States

Today, I farted in front of my husband for the first time in 26 years. He told our kids over email, and now they won't shut up about it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 440
You deserved it 9 234

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You Are just now farting in front of him? ...

How did you survive for 26 years and never farting in front of him?!? Thats some extreme control *claps and nods* lol

Comments

You Are just now farting in front of him? ...

Was it a SillyFart????

Chances are it was not.

Damn!! If it takes her that long to fart I wonder how long it takes for her to take a shit. :p

OP deserves it for not showing her husband that women fart/pee/take a crap, etc. for 26 years :P

Not farting for 26 years is an amazing scientific discovery on how durable humans can be. CALL YOUR LOCAL SCIENTIST, OP!!!!

It's defiantly not her first fart, it just her first noticeable fart. OP's just trying to save face

I feel as though you mean definitely. Defiantly just doesn't work.

was thinging the same thing

That's why you get it out of the way on the 4th date

ever heard of breaking the barrier?

n_epic_fail, are you sure it wasn't her first fart? Because you my friend, are one of those extremely irritating smart ass's.

How'd you hold all that in from your husband for almost 3 decades? I find that quite impressive really!

Actually, my mom is the same. Shes been married to my dad for 27 years and he's never seen a moment of grossness from her. Not one.

I don't find this an Fml when op's user name is" lol"

No one can save your face...

Embrase your "inner self"!! xD

How is she not in a World Records book!?

Everyone has their embarrassing moments - it won't kill you!

Human beings fart... It's natural. Farting in front of him for the first time after you're married is ridiculous! Why do chicks not want to pass gas in any form around other people?? It's natural and healthy!!!!

I personally don't like farting around people because I find it rude. If it slips out, I won't make a big deal about it and neither should anyone else because like you said, it's natural.

I almost died laughing first time I farted around the current gf.. xD she was trying to find my "ticklish" spots and the moment she tries my feet I move my leg suddenly and let a big one go D: lol to this day, 3 months later, she still hasn't once tickled my feet

The embarressment might not kill her, but holding in gas for 26 years might ;)

I'm surprised no one's said "divorce his ass!" We always seem to get tons of those.

Human beings fart!!! Men women and children. 26 years until she actually did.. that's too long. It took my ex 4 months before she released gas, only after I told her it was fine and normal. Sometimes it bothered me but I got her back! Jus a weird connection we had..

26 years!? Damn OP...

Spectaculr buttocks control.

*Spectacular*

Clenching to avoid surprise butt sex???

This reminds me of that College Humor video...

Haha I watched that! I thought of it too...

are the kids angry?

Yes the kids are Just dieing of hate at there mother for farting in front of there dad

There are so many things wrong with this sentence.

That they didnt get to smell their moms first Fart??

Yes"_" the kids are "J"ust "dieing" of hate at "there" mother for farting in front of "there" dad"_" ... aND sum othr thingz lulz!111one1one!1!!1!!111!!!!11!!one

^ wtf is that

#89 wtf is this shit

I'm disliking your comment just because you have that picture..

89- damn, what are you on??

I was being a grammar nazi troll. It was a joke gone horribly wrong apparently.

4- yeah the kids are fucking pissed...

... Why would they be angry???

How did you survive for 26 years and never farting in front of him?!? Thats some extreme control *claps and nods* lol

It is possible, since women don't fart. They spew out rainbows like Nyan Cat.

Sweet lobster babies!

Better out then in.

If that's the most embarrassing thing your husband has witnessed you do in 26 years, I would say you're better off than most married couples. Just read more of the FMLs on here if you need further evidence of this.

Well yeah, I don't think 6 is saying it's not an FML, I think they're just trying to console the op, of course it's an FML, who wants their whole family teaming with the news that you farted, especially if you're deeply embarrassed by it

Yeah, it's more fy family for going on about it

She doesn't say it's the most embarrassing thing she's ever done. I'm all manners of klutz and do ridiculous things all the time. I've never farted in front of my husband either. I've never farted in front of anyone, at least, not since I was a child. I don't know why people do this. Is it really so difficult to wait till you have some privacy? No one wants to smell your shit.

Ugh 32- Well next time you cant hold it and it slips out i hope karma comes at you, yes many can hold it but dont be such a dick, everyone cant always hold it

#55 is the definition of an asskisser.

58- not so much. See I've been around a lil bit. But hey, thanks for trying to sound like a "rebel". My heart just broke for your judgment.... .__.

That's a long time of holding in farts OP..

I could SO see Peter Griffin saying something like that! Lol.

FFS, she didn't hold it in! Maybe she waited till he wasn't home or did it in the loo like a civilised person. Do you just let fucking rip wherever and whenever the mood strikes?

Yeah, yeah I do. Toot toot

Sure I do, if you are offended by farts, stay home.

Well, sometimes you just can't hold it in anymore.

8- I read your comment with Peter's voice in my head.

35 - my parents fart at the dinner table. If you gotta, you gotta. You can usually tell if somebody is holding it in, so if you're comfortable enough, why not?

Like my Grandma always said, "If you gotta fart, do it well." The trouble is, Grandma ALWAYS said that. "Grandma, would you like some more potatoes?" "If you gotta fart, do it well." For the last six years of her life, the only thing she'd say was "If you gotta fart, do it well." It was only funny for the first few months.

, that takes determination

explain "in front"

I'm impressed. Oh, and everyone farts. You probably have a million more embarrassing stories on your kids. ... " remember that time you wet the bed son....?"

weird thing to tell a toddler

I'm guessing that if they've been married for 26 years, their kids aren't toddlers.

Nonetheless it mentions he told the kids over "email". I don't think toddlers would even know where to begin with that lol.

34- ur a idiot that means the kids moved out or in college so the dad sent emails to them informing them of this learn to read other comments

41- Might want to think about taking your own advice before attacking other posters. That will help you avoid looking like a tool in the future.