Work, Embarrassing, Death, Awkward and Farts: Sorry, I…

Sorry, I…

By Anonymous - 07/02/2015 14:33 - United States - Brownwood

Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 837

You deserved it 6 956

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Same thing different taste

Denial

By Loud - 08/09/2016 06:07 - Australia

Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 599

You deserved it 8 496

By Anonymous - 23/05/2012 20:38 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 885

You deserved it 5 186

By Anonymous - 19/08/2014 21:54 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 962

You deserved it 11 822

The sweet smell of success

By NoPromotionForYou - 07/05/2020 14:00

Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 484

You deserved it 640

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 14 868

By Mic - 07/01/2010 17:44 - United States

Today, I was going over some paperwork with my back to my office door. As I turn around, my boss enters and says my name loudly. I was startled so bad that I jumped, yelped, and a high-pitched fart snuck out. Everyone in the office now gives prior notice before dropping by the "fart guy's" office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 535

You deserved it 4 649

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 18:11 - United States

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 983

You deserved it 25 514

Bad day #74746

By orourkeda - 14/04/2021 10:00 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I sharted in work this morning. It was rather unpleasant and everyone around me knew what had happened. The embarrassment was stifling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 188

He who smelled it…

By Anonymous - 31/01/2015 15:08 - United States - Venus

Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 060

You deserved it 2 708

By Hth - 28/10/2008 00:13 - United States

Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 43 745

WCARlover 34

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:57

What a gasshole

devildog562 33

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:57

Hopefully they don't blow it out of proportion .

Comments

iTzSelverZz 14

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:56

That must be a stinky situation.

WCARlover 34

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:57

What a gasshole

mikepzz 27

Sunday 8 February 2015 6:09

*slow clap*

xx000o 27

Sunday 8 February 2015 13:01

Well in its own sick way it was kinda funny.

devildog562 33

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:57

Hopefully they don't blow it out of proportion .

daydreamer244 13

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:57

I've never understood why people get so upset over something so natural.

milehigh52 22

Sunday 8 February 2015 6:12

Bad timing, I would think. If the boss didn't say something so serious, I don't think it would be a big deal.

Devindelon 17

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:59

Next time, just hold it. Farts are very unpredictable sometimes.

Jinxsie 27

Sunday 8 February 2015 8:58

Unpredictable? Maybe that's why OP couldn't hold it in.

Retaheki 27

Monday 9 February 2015 5:03

That's what OP was doing until it got painful, please read next time.

PenguinBitch 43

Sunday 8 February 2015 5:59

I can smell the awkwardness.

mellajella 14

Sunday 8 February 2015 6:00

You really couldn't hold it for another minute after holding it all day? YDI

thefallen12 13

Tuesday 10 February 2015 9:38

I don't think he could because he said it was PAINFUL!

_kyleG_ 34

Sunday 8 February 2015 6:00

Flatulence in the face of misfortunate, not a good look

kyat288 9

Sunday 8 February 2015 6:08

Well that ******* blows

HeWillBeLoved105 22

Sunday 8 February 2015 6:11

I wonder what part of a fart is supposed to be funny..

thefallen12 13

Tuesday 10 February 2015 9:40

All of it? Farts are hilariously awesome lol

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Today, while I was mid-act with my girlfriend, my mom unlocked my bedroom door and came in shaking maracas. She then handed them to my very shocked girlfriend and told her these were the "Busted maracas" and directed her to pass them along accordingly. Well, at least our first time was memorable… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 441

You deserved it 365

Today, my parents were helping me construct my bed. We ended up not having enough screws to properly secure the frame. My dad mentioned that it might cause problems if I got a girl into my bed. My mom said, "Don't worry about it, we all know that's not going to happen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 597

You deserved it 9 210

The Top

Today, I found my bike that was stolen a week ago in front of someone's house. Now this wouldn't have been a problem if my husband didn't steal it to go meet with his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 889

You deserved it 2 570

Today, I told the girl of my dreams that my love for her was deeper than the ocean. She laughed hysterically. This wouldn’t be so bad but we happen to be dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 605

Today, I had to once again lie to a customer about why I was the only one manning the shop, saying that they must have run out for lunch - my coworkers were too busy getting stoned in their cars to do their job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 506

You deserved it 5 248

Today, it was the day my catheter was to be removed. The nurse removing it deflated the balloon, and then tried pulling it out. After me screaming in extreme pain, she found out she hadn't actually deflated the balloon all the way. She was trying to pull a small balloon through my dick hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 345

You deserved it 2 174

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 2 218

Today, while wedding planning, my future MIL complained that the archway was too small for three people. Seeing my confused look, she explained, “Didn’t he tell you? I’m going to be at the altar with you two during the entire ceremony!” He even bought her a ring so she doesn’t feel “left out”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 698

You deserved it 172

Sorry, I…

Same thing different taste

Denial

The sweet smell of success

Bad day #74746

He who smelled it…

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