Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 11 months told me that she's been faking her orgasms the whole time. Just to make me "proud" of myself. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied, "That's OK, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
Today, I tried faking an orgasm for the first time, because I thought it would be sexy for my boyfriend. He stopped to ask me if I was okay. I guess I'm not good at faking it. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML
Today, while I was going down on my girlfriend, she fell asleep. She said she was too tired to fake it. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, after doing it with my girlfriend, she told me that she was "faking the whole time, and thinking of talking cupcakes." FML
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Top comments
Flowtastic 16
Sounds like she was crying about it because she's gonna need that hand later to finish
jnanderson 16
OP you're kind of an asshole. Just because it doesn't look bad to you doesn't mean she isn't hurting.
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Comments (135)
Saone_fml 27
Where is the '"she deserves it" button? if she's gonna go about faking her orgasms she has no right to hold it against the OP, how would he know what to improve in if she just fakes it? :/ As for the hand problem, that's just silly, things don't have to look sore to be sore, and everyone has a different pain tolerance... so you both deserve it. >:(
juwood 7
One of the worst things to utter to a significant other. Sorry OP. Dump that facade and, hopefully, date a more honest individual.
FracturedMinds 21
I could think of ten worse things right off the top of my head.
juwood 7
Well I didn't state that it was THE worst thing, so yes I am sure you can think of another ten, possibly worse things. Good job.
FracturedMinds 21
Thanks. I try.
Nilorak 24
I hope she used her other hand to break yours. ;)
Soulsbane96_fml 11
Woohoo! Physical violence against those we are supposed to love!
iwadasn 33
Woohoo! Not understanding sarcasm on the internet!
VampOfSavannah 31
Do bones have to be protruding from her hand in order to be painful? Jackass.
Dinoporeon 9
A bone or two wouldn't hurt. :)
Godsofdracos 15
There was a bone protruding from her hand, it just wasn't hers :)
zahidnasir 22
she rocked you shocked
Stitcher 14
"it obviously wasn't very serious" how the hell would you know? pain isn't visible. you totally deserved that comment. both for being a ******** and for being selfish in bed. F her life, not yours.
SuperMew 22
It its not on fire, Op doesn't care.
deathstroke990 22
YDI for being an asshole
kaytasha 18
Ouch....that hurts for both sides. You were being totally tactless and cruel with that remark and she should have been more honest with you in the bedroom...
jmcr 27
She could have just said that as a response for him being a thoughtless jerk
Dandony02 4
sorry for asking but whats OP?
kylieh72 25
Google, my friend.
Grimnirwher9 21
OP = Original Poster, the person who posted this FML.
nightowl713 25
# 30, in the time it took you to type that, you could have just answered the question. Everyone was once new to FML. No need to be a jerk about it. They asked in the right place, what better way to find out than on the app/site the abbreviation is so often used?
FracturedMinds 21
OP does not mean google... Learn yo' terms son.
gracehi 33
I'm actually really impressed with the people in this thread. Usually there's at least five people giving various bullshit answers such as: Orange Platypus, or Orangutan Poop.
elleedee 4
But #51, you would need to be new to the ENTIRE internet. OP has been a term for more than 20 years at this point. And that's just the time that I've been seeing it. I couldn't even get on the internet until I was 8. And the solution of using Google when you don't know a term is a solution that will work with 9 out of 10 internet vocabulary issues. Answering the question to hand just leaves the person with no idea of how to answer their questions going forward in a self-sufficient manner.
DaMann360 19
Original Poster
TallMist 32
#88 In "Yu-Gi-Oh!" card game terms, OP means over powered. A chatroom I go to calls the staff OPs, which is short for chat operators. Here. on FML, OP means original poster. So, considering that Google would have given #28 at least three different answers, I think it was fair #28 asked here.
therouni 23
Yeah, you walked right into that. Thats what you get for not being sympathetic, I guess.