Today, while having sex with my husband, we had to move around our cat during position changes. Our cat controls our sex life. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML
I did not consent to this under my roof
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cockblocked me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML
Sexy catboys rule my life
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
Pussy palace
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML
Today, when my boyfriend and I were becoming intimate, his cat decides to jump onto the bed and lie right in between us. He then informs me that he wanted to stop to "preserve his cat's innocence." FML
My girl
Today, I woke up with my girl laying next to me in bed. When she woke up we started to get hot and heavy but all of a sudden our cat hops on the bed. I guess the cat was more important cause my girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by another pussy. FML
Today, my wife and I were getting intimate for the first time in several months. Then we heard our son yelling from the other room needing my help. He needed me to scratch his foot because the cat was on his lap and he couldn't reach it. FML
The Lovecats
Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML
Top comments
luc887_fml 28
Cats control everything. "Dogs have masters, cats have slaves."
imp4ct 15
pussyblocked?
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Comments (121)
cgirl5 4
I'm no genius but how about maybe, ya know, CLOSING THE DOOR?... Have fun ;D
phenomanand 9
talk about being pussy whipped!
MarindaCupcake 4
I'm glad to know me and my boyfriend aren't the only ones.
kaoticroy 10
Kick that shit out and get a dog
chawlar 2
Seriously? Just throw the damn cat out and enjoy yourselves, instead of whining about it.
coldasfire 23
Because moving the cat is too mainstream
withered 30
Bitching about cats when there is no problem seems to be more trendy.
withered 30
YDI. Learn to discipline your cats. Just because it's a "small animal" it doesn't mean it doesn't need to be trained. You know you could just grab the cat and place it outside of the room?
OMG_I_Anonymous 4
it just wanted in on the action,