Today, my parents hassled me for wanting to get my tongue pierced, saying it was filthy, unprofessional, and degrading. About an hour later, my sister let slip that my nipple is pierced. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML
Today, at work, a customer told me how unprofessional my piercing made me look, and insisted that someone else wait on his table. It's not a piercing, it's a mole. FML
Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML
Today, my little sister thought it'd be cool to pierce my nose while I was asleep. FML
Today, I got my eyebrow pierced. When I got home to show my family, my little sister said, "That's so fake!" and tore it off my face. FML
Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML
Today, I've been sitting here for what seems like an eternity listening to my mom ruthlessly grill my sister about a piercing she got. Why don't I just leave, you ask? We're in the ER. My grandma is in the ICU, critically ill. But my sister's piercing is apparently a bigger concern. FML
Today, I was threatened with suspension from school because of my nose piercing. I had to explain that it's actually a pimple. FML
Today, I got my lip pierced. By the orthodontist. FML
Today, my brother tried to convince me to get a clitoris piercing at his recently opened piercing studio. FML
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Top comments
Fortuitous 0
At least she didn't tell them about your ******** piercing.
therealsuperman 0
haha "surprise! your nipple is pierced"
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Comments (224)
IcyJack 7
I was reefer-ing to the topmost comment, but I don't expect anything less from Kay. Post Script: Another emoticon tossed in for random reason: ³~ ³
misterhat 0
m ai furzt?
DocBastard 40
You choose THIS as your first comment?? Get out. Get out and never come back. EDIT: Grrrr! Mods making me look stoopid again. *le sigh*
boopityboppity 11
Here's hoping he also chose this as his last comment.
DocBastard 40
Actually, "m ai furzt" in Esperanto means "Baseball bat in my ass, please."
stacers 0
No worries 98 that's what I thought too when I first read it.
IdkPIZZA 0
I thought that too D: then I decided to act like an idiot and found out what it said :)
DocBastard 40
I'd like to think Sirin mod-ified BBB's comment, but I don't think even her fantastical brain could conjure up this verbal diarrhea.
taff_fml 1
This was the funniest thing I have ever read.
vannahlol 6
I like how people assume that if you get your tongue pierced you're a *****. Some people think of it as art. I have my tongue pierced and I'm most definitely not, a *****. OP, fyl indeed.
golfchick84 0
It's only unprofessional if you don't take it out before you go to work....that way it doesn't get caught on your customer's balls.
golfchick84 0
sorry grammar error... I meant customers' balls
scubasw1fey 0
boopitybobbity- I believe murder and a tongue piercing have no relation what so ever. so to compare my little quote like that is an asinine thing to do. you honestly think I would sit there and tell someone to try murder? your a true genuine ass monkey! FAIL on ur behalf!
boopityboppity 11
I will assume that's supposed my name, as you're apparently fond of misspelling words. I will also assume it is because you have an intense dislike of having your comment shunted over to the right that you didn't hit "reply." The other option is that you don't know how, but I'm assuming (perhaps I should stop) you are more intelligent than a gorilla. Now, to business. I said I disliked the particular phrase because of its inclusiveness, not that murder == a piercing. I am not a fan of it because people saying it always will knock things before they try them. A prostitute could say the same thing, and I rather doubt you're much inclined to try prostitution. Also, why did you type out "your" in one sentence and only use "ur" in the next?
aliaskis 3
Notice the incorrect form of "you're." This explains the usage of "ur." Ignorance and laziness, my friend.
aliaskis 3
Also (this made me chuckle) "what so ever" must involve snapping of fingers in a zigzag. It's one word. whatsoever.
rogerover 19
I don't think they're ******. I just think they like to go down on others.
deltako_isgee 0
Uhmmm Everybody Has Different Opinions, I Personally Think Piercings Are Sexy:] I Have Quite A Few Myself (Snakebites, Eyebrow, Gauges &Industrial On Both Sidess) I Don't See How Their "Unprofessional" For The People That Said They Were!? Haa I Think That's Funny Though ^_^
boopityboppity 11
Your knowledge of the location of the "shift" key amazes us all.
ktrose 0
I was thinking the exact same thing boopity.
Seddah 3
Unless it's a title, every word does not need a capital. But I do have to say, snake bite is super goddamn sexy.
deltako_isgee 0
Uhmm I Don't Think Anyone Really Caress!? Only You Would Say Some Quite Ignorant As That. Common Like Really? Hahah
KennKenn 0
maybe you can "let slip" she's pregnant