By Anonymous - 24/09/2012 19:09 - United States

Today, my mother found a hickey on my neck. Not believing that it was from the hungry 2-month-old child I was holding, she confronted my boyfriend about it. He promptly accused me of cheating. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 889
You deserved it 2 674
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

CoachBangWhore 5

That's why you don't let a toddler get to second base on you

126 12

Comments

perdix 29

What we've learned today is that if you are more than six months old, you're a pedophile! How does a baby give a hickey with no ******' teeth?

10 45
junkman6 22

You really have no clue how a hickey works? Damn that's...... interesting.

38 1
perdix 29

Yes, I do. The biting part is what leaves the really nice bruise. ;)

0 36
ObsessedWithGays 7

I believe the "bruise" is from ruptured blood vessels.

16 0
BossPathfinderGM 14

Suction, more than anything else, is what pulls blood from the capillaries.

23 1
TBelle4Ever 15

Perdix, a hickey forms from the baby sucking on her neck, not biting.

27 1
Feklfekl2222 32

28- all bruises are ruptured blood vessels not just love bites

0 8
trivel64 16

What? Perdix slipped up? Thought I'd never see the day...

13 0
fmlallthetyme 23

Biting just leaves a better, more defined outline...

0 0
Feklfekl2222 32

Oh sorry my phones been playing up a bit at the moment

1 1
Enslaved 36

Hell! Then feed that baby! Don't let him/her suck on your neck to the point of leaving a hickey mark. What is wrong with you?

31 2
ydi_4_suking 20

It's between a hickey on the nipple or on the neck

11 1
TheMathMajor 26

It doesn't take that long to get a hicky (at least for me, I have sensitive skin). She could have stopped the baby quickly and still have gotten a mark if it sucked hard enough.

3 0
momogal 22

You've never had a baby latch on to any part of your skin have you? A baby I watched once latched onto my arm while I was rocking her. She let go immediately, but it still left a "hickey."

2 0
martin_martian7 11

Damn you baby!

6 2
PipingMouse 14

More like, Damn why didn't I pay more attention while I was babysitting.

3 2
WrongRomance 11

Come on, you should have just said It was the vacuum. or you fell on a chair. Or you got hit in the neck while playing ping pong.

6 1
lacespace 8

Most babies I've encountered have been pretty slutty

14 6
lacespace 8

As I write this I'm sitting next to a topless baby. Case closed.

22 0
baronsmommy 14

My son once gave me a hickey on my chin when he was learning to give kisses, luckily my hubby was a witness so I didn't have to explain it later.

13 1
kittygirl21 5

Jeez I think the people around you need to gain a little trust.

4 0