Today, my mother found a hickey on my neck. Not believing that it was from the hungry 2-month-old child I was holding, she confronted my boyfriend about it. He promptly accused me of cheating. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend keeps trying to convince me that the hickey on his neck was from his friend attacking him with a vacuum cleaner. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML
Today, my mom noticed the hickey that I have on my neck. Embarrassed, I tried convincing her that I burnt myself using a hair straightener. She then told me that that's the same excuse she told my grandma when she got a hickey. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML
Today, for our 8 month anniversary, my boyfriend bought me a hideous necklace with ugly charms hanging off it. I wore it anyway and got a rash from it on the side of my neck. After seeing the rash my boyfriend accused me of having a hickey from another guy and broke up with me. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend started a fake argument and pretended to be mad at me for four days, which was almost enough time for the gigantic hickey that my best friend gave her on her neck to heal. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was unsure of the future of our relationship, so he gave me a gigantic hickey to "show the world that I'm his." I work as a cashier and see people I know personally on a daily basis. FML
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Top comments
CoachBangWhore 5
That's why you don't let a toddler get to second base on you
nursestudent 5
That sucks ;)
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Comments (128)
insaneygolover 9
You let a 2 month old duck on your neck to the point they gave u a hickey?!
ElishaisSexy2016 9
Ugh, do u just hate accusers who don't get all the story??
mookiemookie01 24
They really should calm down and not jump to conclusions
Iniezian 18
Why is it even your mother's business if you have a hickey? Judging by what you've told us, you're obviously in a committed relationship and independent. How is your sex life any of her business?
Annayers 9
Hey boyfriend, prove it!
SunshineX7 17
Hungry enough to resort to cannibalism...scary. Feed the baby!
worldclassrager 41
Well that didn't work out...not one thing to your favor...but it seems like your boyfriend didn't leave yo
doglover100 29
She needs to mind her own business.
ryuprincesd 0
Why did you let a child suck on your neck.....weird
starsierra 15
I need a followup unless there is one then tell mev