By LonelyHeart - 22/10/2009 12:09 - United States

Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 681
You deserved it 3 327

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If he told you he wanted time alone why did you go looking for him?

You didn't go to "surprise" him, you felt insecure and wanted confirmation.

Comments

THREESOME!!!

I've heard two minds are better than one.

AnaMaree 0

THREESOME

Obviously, you are just not able to please him. Sucks for you.

sex makes the world go round and cencorship keeps it from spining out of whack

123sploosh 0

third

SayPeanuts 29

Please don't do that.

I even bet he was with a woman.

My bet is Phil from Accounting. That guy could suck a golf ball through a garden hose... ...not that I know anything about that from personal experience...

You know what, I'm not gonna lie to you, I'm kind of a big deal around here.

I'm also not gonna lie. It smells like pure gasoline.

Why don't you go back to your home on Whore Island?

I'm gonna punch you in the ovary. Pow. When you're not looking.

Let's go over the ground rules, then. Rule #1 - No touching of the hair or face (of course). AND THAT'S IT! (looks a bit closer) mercy, where did you get a hand grenade?

I remember you! =O

it looks like my response comment was lost, too. I forgot what I said, too. Tamer - I kind of remember you. You parked in that tow-away zone, had your vehicle towed away, and started hurling monkey feces at the tow-truck driver. I think I was tripping balls when you were doing this, though.

Okay, that's enough irrelevant, stupid conversations for one day. Take them elsewhere.

@ #22: Anchorman WIN!

If he told you he wanted time alone why did you go looking for him?

I'm guessing she thought he only meant for the previous night, not the next day as well.

OP's a guy....

dspadres 0

AIDS

well i suppose great minds think alike and they just out smarted you

I'm just glad your (ex)boyfriend didn't decide to write an FML about how his girlfriend caught him with hickies on his neck after cheating on her.

kellster 2

I'm pretty sure they're both men, actually, since the poster is listed as a man and all.

Holy shit, I didn't even look at that. Well now I look like an idiot.

You didn't go to "surprise" him, you felt insecure and wanted confirmation.

Why is it that people are so randy to use quotation marks when they "don't make sense" (like there), but so shy to use them when they do (like in this FML, to indicate the sardonic tone of "mind")? Sigh.