FML : Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate...

396

Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By quickfingers100 / Friday 22 July 2011 13:38 / United Kingdom

Intimacy

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Top comments

By grapisy | 8

#2952614 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:20

Still counts.

By BaconDave | 12

#2952700 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:25

Doesn't matter have sex

Comments

By FUUUandyourmom | 16

#2952600 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:20

What a wonderful girlfriend you've got there!

friscoed | 0

#2952666 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:23

Well atleast shes enviornmentally friendly by using paper instead of plastic.. =]

JangiJangiJangi | 0

#2952785 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:30

why did op just take it off his head ? stupid. ydi

JangiJangiJangi | 0

#2952814 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:32

I mean why DIDN'T he take it off. typo

smurfsarwales | 9

#2952980 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:50

can you finish if you're unconscious?

ismellrealbad | 0

#2953061 - Friday 22 July 2011 20:00

bird is the word

nixter5 | 18

#2953487 - Friday 22 July 2011 20:59

BEST 3 minutes of ya life!!

iluvboobies | 9

#2953656 - Friday 22 July 2011 21:27

30

He was obviously handcuffed to the bed posts.

wolflover44 | 5

#2953763 - Friday 22 July 2011 21:48

That's some kinky stuff right there! I know how to make handcuffs out of a teeshirt... :D lol.

THEmuffinpan | 0

#2954005 - Friday 22 July 2011 22:48

No you know how to tie someones wrists with a T-shirt.

kcutie | 0

#2954488 - Saturday 23 July 2011 0:19

unless OP has a history of hyperventilating.. then. understand. otherwise his gf is stupid and conceited as hell

Tektite | 14

#2955641 - Saturday 23 July 2011 5:11

Maybe she was planning on suffocating you ;).. You rich?

FurryPride | 9

#2957311 - Saturday 23 July 2011 8:46

That's some kinky stuff the 160. (sarcasm)

StopDropNRoll | 11

#2964823 - Sunday 24 July 2011 15:27

I don't know how using paper is environmentally friendly. last time I checked paper came from trees....

roobear | 2

#2970028 - Monday 25 July 2011 7:15

We can plant new trees; we cannot plant new oil. Not in the same context, anyway.

maz_irken | 6

#2977722 - Tuesday 26 July 2011 6:18

Yep. I'm sure THAT's why she put a bag over your head!

Kitouran | 30

#6518928 - Monday 25 January 2016 0:15

Last time I checked, plastic isn't biodegradable.

By sephoraprincess | 7

#2952606 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:20

haha.

howslife123 | 0

#2952799 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:32

HAHA!

hoodasswhitekid | 0

#2952912 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:41

HAHAHA!!!

Garyy_fml | 11

#2952969 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:46

HAHAHA... wait, thats stupid.

TheRealHouse | 7

#2954210 - Friday 22 July 2011 23:28

Moohawhaw!!

By XxXHaCkErXxX | 0

#2952610 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:20

wow...you uh might wanna look in the mirror and see what she's talking about, 'cause it obviously can't be the reason she gave you.

daisyloo | 7

#2953327 - Friday 22 July 2011 20:37

Sneaky haha!

howslife123 | 0

#2954678 - Saturday 23 July 2011 1:04

she has pretty high self esteem for someone who has to make sure guys don't see her naked :$

WishResign | 0

#2954847 - Saturday 23 July 2011 1:54

228, is that truly what you got out of it? she thinks her bf is ugly or makes ugly faces in bed.

howslife123 | 0

#2955073 - Saturday 23 July 2011 2:36

yes it is! because it says the girlfriend says she's really good in bed!! so.. yeah

By grapisy | 8

#2952614 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:20

Still counts.

hoodasswhitekid | 0

#2952881 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:38

i wonder if he finished before he fainted

BaconDave | 12

#2952922 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:42

I know have that sing stuck in my head. It's family day.

BaconDave | 12

#2952943 - Friday 22 July 2011 19:44

I meant song. Me and my phone are going to have a very stern talk about this.

spazmattic | 0

#2953224 - Friday 22 July 2011 20:23

I think she might have been a racist

Saltime | 0

#2953288 - Friday 22 July 2011 20:32

91, Doesn't matter, have sex.

TripleD76 | 1

#2953663 - Friday 22 July 2011 21:28

But I cried the whole time!

Zestyschmidty | 4

#2953799 - Friday 22 July 2011 21:54

Lol the lonely old island

Saltime | 0

#2954002 - Friday 22 July 2011 22:47

163, No. Bob Marley.

austin10mink | 0

#2954231 - Friday 22 July 2011 23:31

doesn't matter had sex

masterass333 | 0

#2955355 - Saturday 23 July 2011 4:01

beat me to it

opeagles | 0

#2955423 - Saturday 23 July 2011 4:21

lonelyiand and akon!!! love itt lol

BShady96 | 0

#2955613 - Saturday 23 July 2011 5:07

she mightve been a racist

grapisy | 8

#2956574 - Saturday 23 July 2011 6:54

262- if you love it so much why don't you know the name of the band? I will now be google.
Did you mean lonely island? Make comments instead about Lonely island.