Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
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Top comments
By
grapisy
| 8
Still counts.
By
BaconDave
| 12
Doesn't matter have sex
COMMENTS
By
FUUUandyourmom
| 16
What a wonderful girlfriend you've got there!
Reply
friscoed
| 0
Well atleast shes enviornmentally friendly by using paper instead of plastic.. =]
Reply
JangiJangiJangi
| 0
why did op just take it off his head ? stupid. ydi
Reply
JangiJangiJangi
| 0
I mean why DIDN'T he take it off. typo
Reply
smurfsarwales
| 9
can you finish if you're unconscious?
Reply
ismellrealbad
| 0
bird is the word
Reply
nixter5
| 18
BEST 3 minutes of ya life!!
Reply
iluvboobies
| 9
30
He was obviously handcuffed to the bed posts.
He was obviously handcuffed to the bed posts.
Reply
wolflover44
| 5
That's some kinky stuff right there! I know how to make handcuffs out of a teeshirt... :D lol.
Reply
THEmuffinpan
| 0
No you know how to tie someones wrists with a T-shirt.
Reply
kcutie
| 0
unless OP has a history of hyperventilating.. then. understand. otherwise his gf is stupid and conceited as hell
Reply
Tektite
| 14
Maybe she was planning on suffocating you ;).. You rich?
Reply
FurryPride
| 9
That's some kinky stuff the 160. (sarcasm)
Reply
StopDropNRoll
| 11
I don't know how using paper is environmentally friendly. last time I checked paper came from trees....
Reply
roobear
| 2
We can plant new trees; we cannot plant new oil. Not in the same context, anyway.
Reply
maz_irken
| 6
Yep. I'm sure THAT's why she put a bag over your head!
Reply
Kitouran
| 30
Last time I checked, plastic isn't biodegradable.
By
sephoraprincess
| 7
haha.
Reply
howslife123
| 0
HAHA!
Reply
hoodasswhitekid
| 0
HAHAHA!!!
Reply
Garyy_fml
| 11
HAHAHA... wait, thats stupid.
Reply
TheRealHouse
| 7
Moohawhaw!!
By
XxXHaCkErXxX
| 0
wow...you uh might wanna look in the mirror and see what she's talking about, 'cause it obviously can't be the reason she gave you.
Reply
daisyloo
| 7
Sneaky haha!
Reply
howslife123
| 0
she has pretty high self esteem for someone who has to make sure guys don't see her naked :$
Reply
WishResign
| 0
228, is that truly what you got out of it? she thinks her bf is ugly or makes ugly faces in bed.
Reply
howslife123
| 0
yes it is! because it says the girlfriend says she's really good in bed!! so.. yeah
By
grapisy
| 8
Still counts.
Reply
hoodasswhitekid
| 0
i wonder if he finished before he fainted
Reply
BaconDave
| 12
I know have that sing stuck in my head. It's family day.
Reply
BaconDave
| 12
I meant song. Me and my phone are going to have a very stern talk about this.
Reply
spazmattic
| 0
I think she might have been a racist
Reply
Saltime
| 0
91, Doesn't matter, have sex.
Reply
TripleD76
| 1
But I cried the whole time!
Reply
Zestyschmidty
| 4
Lol the lonely old island
Reply
Saltime
| 0
163, No. Bob Marley.
Reply
austin10mink
| 0
doesn't matter had sex
Reply
masterass333
| 0
beat me to it
Reply
opeagles
| 0
lonelyiand and akon!!! love itt lol
Reply
BShady96
| 0
she mightve been a racist
Reply
grapisy
| 8
262- if you love it so much why don't you know the name of the band? I will now be google.
Did you mean lonely island? Make comments instead about Lonely island.
Did you mean lonely island? Make comments instead about Lonely island.
By
nolarboot
| 10
But why would you leave it over your head? I say you deserve it. :P
Reply
arirsmommy
| 0
I agree sorry but who is dumb enough to allow the bag over your head in the first place???
Reply
ismellrealbad
| 0
I am!!!!
Reply
je_suis_fml
| 11
54- a guy who wants a nut.
By
androiddestroya
| 7
she seriously thought that would help??
By
Garyy_fml
| 11
She's a keeper.
By
Friaza
| 29
Paper bag > All
Reply
Molord1
| 0
what...?
By
xXxXxMasonxXxXx
| 7
dump her, or next time tell her to poke a hole for ur mouth, nose, and eyes if ur into that kinda stuff >_>
Reply
sonangedemusique
| 2
your picture!!!! Is that from the Tim Burton exhibit at the MoMA in ny??
By
ismellrealbad
| 0
is your girlfriend stupid?
Reply
Symmetry88
| 0
no but you are.
Reply
JakeLee
| 6
I like your ear. it's a very nice ear. it has character.
Reply
ismellrealbad
| 0
thank you