By Massasam - 11/10/2011 20:53 - United States

Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 759
You deserved it 41 972

Same thing different taste

Top comments

harrywestt 0

Ok first of why the hell would u even want to eat while taking a leak? Just saying kinda stupid.


Need a moment? Chew it over with twix, not a breakfast bar!

Had this been me, I would've performed flawlessly. My aim while urinating rivals that of a Navy SEAL marksman.

Damn_Hippster 11

Butterfingers, or in this case, pissfingers.

girls can even put clothes on while peeing :)

rallets 22
That0therguy 4

It's not epic. Why? Why would dropping your candy bar in the toilet with piss be epic? Besides, "Epic Fail" is so old.

nublets 12

Well he sure dropped the 'bar' on that one

buiscit 0

A breakfast bar is still a breakfast bar you should have just ate it anyway

i would have been pissed if that happened to me.(;

Nice comment, but isn't it "lowered the bar?"

Thats why i sit and pee... What? Noone else does that??

Who the hell eats candy bars for breakfast?? Now skittles.....

Looks like his candy bar... Got pissed!

Looks like the candy bar would rather be pissed on than pissed off

1 as flockz picture says 'I SEE WHAT YOU ******* DID THERE'.

67. Hmm, would the 5 second rule be used here..?

77 I think it's the 0.1 second rule, if it went in the toilet with piss.

That0therguy 4
vitality555 0
Ricky23J 0
StopDropNRoll 11

Idk if anyone noticed. But he missed the toilet while pissing and only got the candy bar in there. So the candy bar wasn't pissed just him.

harrywestt 0

Ok first of why the hell would u even want to eat while taking a leak? Just saying kinda stupid.

Why not? You know the saying, it's like killing 2 birds with 1 stone

I thought it was murdering two stones with a bird. No wonder people have been calling me stupid.

FYLDeep 25

I'd call you stupid just for misusing the word murder, which is defined as taking place between humans. Humans can't murder animals, and animals can't murder humans. Which is why that saying "Fur is murder" is so ridiculous.

Maybe he wanted to give the bar a sneak peek at its imminent future?

51. Yeah, it'll end up in the toilet eventually, if he ate it

kleider1 9

U said first but I see no second point in your comment

I knew a guy that would have a full meal while taking a shit on the thrown. Ha, classic!

46 people call me stupid for a lot of things. I embrace my stupidity. :D

FYLDeep 25

#96 Well, murder is a crime. Dumb people use the word way too much to describe killings of various sorts that are no way illegal. It certainly implies that they did something wrong.

ReynshineCutting 10

109- So sadistically killing an animal isn't wrong?

FYLDeep 25

#136 That falls under laws of animal cruelty, nothing to do with murder. Besides if you wanted to make a point about various things people do that are wrong, there's plenty of other things you could mention that are in fact perfectly legal.

FYLDeep 25

BTW, I was not trying to make a point about MrSassypants in particular. I was making a point about the misuse of words. Far too often people misuse that one and I personally really can't take their argument seriously when they do that.

Who doesn't eat while taking a shit. It comes naturally.

HA!!! I caught one!!! It's THRONE!!! Grammar police, to the rescue!!!

:S eating while using the toilet? But....urine and fecal splatter! (if flushing or peeing while standing that is)

Decapitation 3

Adding "Haha" and extending the word fail doesn't make your comment original.

Naming your self decapitation doesn't make you original.. Stop trolling on stupid shit man

Decapitation 3

Um... Actually it does. If my name was decapitation135 then it would be unoriginal.

Not the point man it's don't be a prick about stupid stuff.

Screw bacon, I wouldn't make her be in the kitchen. Btw skrillex is amazing!

So you both creeped on this girl, then decided your self esteem was low enough to go for it. And the best lines you think of to throw are ones of food and the making of the foods... Except the first guy did seem very into bacon and I think he'd cheat on you.. with the bacon. Can I say cool story bro's?..... :D

I don't care if somebody on the Internet thinks I'm a creep. :D I just have to know I'm not a creep especially in real life.

:O I would never cheat on a girl. And I certainly wouldn't cheat on her with a piece of bacon that would ruin it! I just omnomnom on bacon, not have sex with it.

surely you could do that as you're walking to you car, or leaving the bathroom even

pinkzilla0 8