Today, my girlfriend of two years called me, drunk, telling me how much anal sex hurts with some other guy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after being apart for a few weeks, my girlfriend made love to me so hard I got bruises on my penis and it hurts to pee out of it. FML
Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML
Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML
Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that last night after I got drunk, I passed out mid-pump while we were knocking boots. FML
Today, I thought the girl I was seeing was going to tell me that she loved me. Instead, she told me how she sucked some other guy's dick. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML
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Top comments
Astraea 0
definitely an fml, i can imagine how you feel right now. **** that bitch with a huge dry stick in the butt then dump her!!
mponce12 0
what a dirty little bitch
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Comments (128)
BlackR6Rider 5
fyl dude...shouldn't have tried to turn a hoe into a housewife... (>.<)v
killpro 0
I popped a boner
purplemnm 9
"god my ass feels like a pin cushion!"
bobbyb57 0
lol you should just bang all her friends and call her and tell her that it was better with them
prettyreckless17 0
she probably just wanted to tell you so you dont try it.shes apparently a nice drunk and wants you to be safe when bending over for another man.
goldspeck 0
op maybe she got take. advantage of? if she called you I mean maybe she was not very conscious or aware of what was realy going on. talk to her the follwing day
kaengelangeleyes 9
I agree.. Thats scary
strawberry6826 0
lmfaooo
1kj2 0
ohhhhhh that sucks
parkersbudd 0
f**k the ho
justanotherhuman 21
Dear OP, F...Y...L. If something like this isn't grounds for immediate termination, don't know what is. Even if it was a drunk joke, it's quite revealing. Terminate immediately!