Today, my girlfriend of two years called me, drunk, telling me how much anal sex hurts with some other guy. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, after being apart for a few weeks, my girlfriend made love to me so hard I got bruises on my penis and it hurts to pee out of it. FML
Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML
Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML
Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that last night after I got drunk, I passed out mid-pump while we were knocking boots. FML
Today, I thought the girl I was seeing was going to tell me that she loved me. Instead, she told me how she sucked some other guy's dick. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the very first time in three years. Apparently, all it took was anal. FML
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Top comments
Astraea 0
definitely an fml, i can imagine how you feel right now. **** that bitch with a huge dry stick in the butt then dump her!!
mponce12 0
what a dirty little bitch
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Comments (128)
ImanAshBurn 0
here's a cookie. cheer up!
perdix 31
You can pretend that the good news is that she is saving her ****** for you! :)
CallMeHush 1
So she screwed around on you and the guy had a bigger johnson. No worries, she'll like your big wallet and little dick when she sobers up. What was that? You don't have a big wallet? You're ******.
sourgirl101 29
I was wondering the same thing. Why didn't it hurt with you when you had anal?
dannnngthatsux 19
You don't know they had anal, maybe she only had it because she was drunk, and he wouldn't take advantage of her when she was. Others are right, she's a ***** that you don't need to spend your time on.
Sekococo 0
Is this the Same chick who wrote " i have to lift up my buttcheek to dry them"? i heard that you get a booty after anal O_o just saying. Heres a cookies OP you need it buddy.
logand 3
dump her !
Winsome 1
maybe she doesn't do anal with the OP or maybe OP actually cared about her and did it right - there are less painful ways if that's what you're into
tomahawkinyouall 0
either way that's gross
oneforme 0
fart in her mouth
thatssomeBS 9
YDI for not giving that bitch what she wants... if you would've givin her the ass-****** she wanted she wouldn't have found someone else.
samantha_durano 6
god what the **** I hate cheaters.