Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
Today, my period was a few days late, so my anxiety kicked in and I told my husband I was worried about being pregnant. He pointedly said that pregnancy requires sex, and I suddenly remembered we haven't had sex in months. I haven't cheated, but good luck convincing his suspicious ass of that. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML
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Top comments
golden_warrior 23
I hope you talked to her about your needs in the relationship rather than venting on fml
mangobbler 11
Hopefully her period is just late. If she is indeed pregnant, and you two haven't had sex in a year... she has some serious explaining to do. Chin up, OP. Hopefully it is just a minor scare. PS: Put some Marvin Gaye playing and fix that sexless relationship. xD
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Comments (205)
missd420 16
Just because you aren't getting any, doesn't mean she isn't. FYL
qwertyu_ioplk 9
oh god, i think you need to break up, if she is THAT dumb........
JordynnLOL 11
A persons intelligence doesn't determine whether they deserve a relationship or not..
hilde43 5
If I were you OP I would move on to the next women cause she is pretty stupid if she thinks she's pregnant without sex
Lucky7Samson 10
She's cheating on you bro. No adults go sexless for a year. NONE.
dangousity 21
Uh why on earth is that?
TheyCallMeDamien 17
Did you ever think you're the one who's been sexless for a year?
sarahadlina 14
Unless she's cheating on u... Just saying..
mehdiuk_fml 2
Correction! You had a sexless life, it seems she has been busier.
circlelranch69 1
Hey dude your not really that dumb are you. Its her body unless you like carry around 24/7 maybe she ****** someone else. It has happened even to dumbasses like you
twinkie193 6
You're not having sex, she is