Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
Today, my period was a few days late, so my anxiety kicked in and I told my husband I was worried about being pregnant. He pointedly said that pregnancy requires sex, and I suddenly remembered we haven't had sex in months. I haven't cheated, but good luck convincing his suspicious ass of that. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she feels pregnant. I didn't believe her, given how recently we had sex for the first time, so I told her to take a test to make sure. She's very sure now. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML
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Top comments
golden_warrior 23
I hope you talked to her about your needs in the relationship rather than venting on fml
mangobbler 11
Hopefully her period is just late. If she is indeed pregnant, and you two haven't had sex in a year... she has some serious explaining to do. Chin up, OP. Hopefully it is just a minor scare. PS: Put some Marvin Gaye playing and fix that sexless relationship. xD
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Comments (205)
honeymoonroyale 20
Damn. Red flag much?
JokersHQ 21
I know this sounds really stupid but this is actually a fairly common fear among younger women (I'm not quite sure why but that is what I have heard from various sources). I know it kinda sucks but the best thing to do would be to remind her that you haven't had sex so there is nothing to worry about and just treat her the same. If you show that it bothers you/ annoys you she may become more self conscious and may not want to confide in you as much anymore for fear you may think its stupid, which even though you may, just show a little compassion instead and play it down. That's the best advice I can give. Hope it helps.
devonnettnin 7
To me that sounds like she's cheating bro
missyamaha 11
holy ****! how have you lasted that long!! CLEARLY she is sleeping around when she hasn't put out for you in over a year and she thinks she's pregnant. unless she's the dumbest twit on the planet! kick her fukn ass to the curb and get someone else who is either A) a shitload smarter and B) actually wants to sleep with you. fukn dog of a missus
cubbi54 6
She's cheating on you mate
Dre27 20
Don't you think you would want to at least try that before you moved in together?
ULie909 8
OP.... U are "NOT" the father!!! Lol
Narcisse_fml 25
If she thought she was pregnant, chances are she's having sex with somebody! She just forgot that "somebody" was not you.
pdp_fml 21
Maybe she thinks that sleeping in the same bed could make you pregnant?
Cazz91 21
Your girlfriend is either an idiot or a cheater. I hope for your feelings sake that she's just a bloody idiot OP but I find that possible explanation to be a lower percentage than betting on she had cheated and slipped up to you without thinking. Sorry to read this sad event for you OP. :(