By noneedtostress - 17/03/2012 15:52 - Australia

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 872
You deserved it 10 476

Same thing different taste

Top comments

It's time to break that dry spell, friend. Get freaky.


RawrzIIshScareh 0

You know... People like you are super annoying.

KRS_13 0

I'm curious to see what 1 said..

They should let us see 1s comment even though it was moderated....

I'm curious as to why she is taking birth control pills if she isn't having sex

Some women take them for painful periods or to regulate them, lol clearly not working in OP's case

I don't know much about periods but aren't pills supposed to stop you from getting periods? (as a positive side-effect)

They can regulate your period, but they don't stop them.

choochee77 0

I wonder what #1's comment was.

cyK0tek 0

Hmm? You say something..? *hehe*

It's time to break that dry spell, friend. Get freaky.

I was playing dance central 2 when I read this haha.

osnapitzaris 0

hm yes, because it's better to have an unplanned pregnancy rather than not getting laid in over a year. :/

106, I don't think anyone actually said that, but definitely dust those cobwebs off! No glove, no love!

Pixxio_O 11

Doesn't matter had se...*awkward silence*

nonamericandolla 6

Omg! I know ur pain! Mission out on having sex with random guy is terrible!

griffins33 4
22cute 17
shanemaximo 7

Sex is not what's important to getting pregnant. Sperm are... Lots and lots of sperm.

Actually you only need one to get pregnant, one very strong and tenacious spermatozoon. The others are just there for the show.

Wrong, one single sperm would not survive long enough to make it to the uterus.

It takes a lot of sperm to weaken the vaginas shields. Continuous concentrated fire can overload shields and then it only takes one sperm cell to kill all of your hopes and dreams.

#37 what are you like am English teacher and feel the need to correct everything?

laurbear12 3

188 - rude much? You're probably one of those people who can't grasp elementary grammar concepts.

Ibanez3x 5

#188-chill, shes just correcting so people won't read it wrong.

OMG a whole year!! What are you going to do! Honestly, you really would say,"F*** My Life" just because you haven't had sex in a year.. You really need to expand your viewpoints on life.

22cute 17

I think the FML is because she panicked about pregnancy when there was no chance, o judgmental one! Maybe YOU need to expand your viewpoint, hmmmm??

^ and thus the profile was born, allowing those to post personal information for all to see.

^ right, because no one in the world has EVER lied about their age online

khamaria 4

Is Sex really that good?? Lmao!!!

At # 10/66, maybe it could be a sign of a medical problem too? In which case FHL. At # 130, wtf?

132, give Ellen a break, she's a lesbian.

RammerJammer93 0

Depeends on who it is with.

Sexual orientation would not alter this FML except for the lack of sperm and the pregnancy part. Except for that... it would be exactly the same. I suppose the detail police are going to give me a Rodney King style beat down. Rumor has it that lesbians have sex and like it. Not sure where they get their sperm? I'll check to see if there is an App for that. Lesbian sperm acquisition, one of the great mysteries of the universe.

Well a friend in need is a friend indeed, so I'm here to offer any kind of help :)

Pixxio_O 11

11- I'm guessing you've experienced this kind of situation multiple times in the past then?..

You've got a friend in me! I'll be happy to share my Woody!

you stalker! who said she was your friend?!

If you haven't had sex…then you should be having to worry about taking the pill at all. That's the real problem here.

Some women take the birth control pill to regulate their period, among other reasons. (: ***One missed pill shouldn't cause being two weeks late though.

Exactly. That's why I take it. I mean, I started taking it for contraceptive reasons, but it'd be silly to just stop when you're not having sex.

CursedSilent 1

I may have to take birth control pills to fight abnormal bleeding and I'm fixed. There's more to birth control pills than just contraceptives.

Yes but why take the pill if you're not active for extended periods of time ?

CursedSilent 1

There are many women who use the pills to regulate their hormones cause their bodies can't for extended periods of time. Just because you can't wrap your mind around that fact does not mean that the pills are only for sex.

118- Sorry I realised that I didn't express myself clearly. What I was meant to write was why take them for reasons other than birth control when there are serious adverse effects that accompany the drug?

CursedSilent 1

Okay, really? Google is your friend, hormone imbalances cause more problems than just cramps and can cause health issues to rival any of the negative effects of birth control. Look into it on your own instead of being handfed the info. Secondly in the end, the reason why anyone is on birth control or not doesn't need justifications. Unless it impacts you somehow, their body, their reasons ;)

I don't need to Google it seeing as I know about the drug. You should look up some of the side effects if you think that severe cramps rival bowel or ovarian cancer. I can't really be bothered to argue though so I'll leave it at that.

Learn not to speak of that which you do not know. Not only are those side effects very rare, but some people take it because they have a condition that gives them unusually long and painful periods, or other awful conditions that can be hazardous to their health.

DoNotEnter 5

At one point, I had cramps that were so painful that I would vomit. Then I went on birth control and voila! The "adverse side effects" are pretty freaking rare, (like single digits of percent's chance or lower of them occurring) and hell if I want to deal with anemia every month if I don't have to.

Haha I went into the comments just because I knew some idiot would write this there are many reason she would still be on the pill for

Cutieday101 0

No,its always good 2 be prepared. Never know,when the "moment" pops up.

We'll tell them that you thought you were pregnant... But it turns out you have crabs.

Well, I don't think talking to the pills would solve anything really. Let alone lie to the pills.