Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend started singing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML
Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML
Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML
Today, my girlfriend called my flaccid penis her "little squishy" in a voice like Dory, and became upset when I got aroused because little squishy was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML
Today, I found out that since I stopped shaving my legs, my boyfriend and his friends have started referring to me as a Wookiee. FML
Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML
Today, my date saw me naked, and was disgusted that 1. I shaved my pubes into a landing strip instead of completely bald, and 2. I missed a few hairs below my knee while shaving my legs. His actual words as he was half out the door were that he "wanted Princess Leia, not Chewbacca." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
pdp_fml 21
Is she turned on by you when you have sex? I wouldn't worry about being short, if you can satisfy her in some other way.
Frelling 0
A chode in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (222)
cobras40 0
fight back, compare her to a woolies with hairy **** or something
MrGold 0
Does your penis make the wookie noise? Gurghhhhh.
DropDead77 11
Ewoks aren't choads!!
hk_fml 9
It sounds like she's trying to get you to dump her. No normal girlfriend insults someone like that without thinking of and accepting the repercussions.
hilariexcore 0
Not always true. I bet they're fairly young and the younger you are the less you really think about consequences..
kingtz 6
I was thinking the same thing. Seems like the gf just doesn't respect OP.
firemaker1211 5
win
DjeePee 25
I'm sorry about your short, stubby and furry penis, but your girlfriend sounds pretty awesome.
TXjuggalo972 6
not really it would get pretty annoying
mfmylifesrsly 30
50 has a chode
natas_fml 13
50's a juggalo. of course it has a chode.
docscientist 10
Emasculation sure is awesome.
TXjuggalo972 6
and what if I do??? lol
mrahhhhh 21
And that's when you shoulda said "It is, kinda like the hair on your upper lip!"
croso88 5
AH HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
insanesna1l 0
mines tall, black, and has a large helmet. it also sounds asthmatic. pity im female and not human
SteelCladAngel 0
sounds like she's got her own darth vader
SteelCladAngel 0
sounds like she's got her own darth vader
MrGold 0
haha no she drew the short straw. good enough?
khaya 9
I say threesome, with chewbacca.