By Anonymous - 16/08/2009 17:14 - United States

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML
I agree, your life sucks 63 071
You deserved it 10 938

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Top comments

spidergirl41 0

Does she like carrots? Also, don't forget the ranch!!! xD

Dmaster22 0

your penis is orange? JK FYL


mandark 9

Does it crunch? ;D FYL. (First! :B)

gammagamma 2

you arent funy Anyway, i dont see why people feel the need to name penises. Especially something like that. If this is real then your girlfriend is an idiot. FYL

mandark 9

Wasn't trying to be funny, actually. And nice comment at the top of the page. e_e

F_fatchick_lives 0

If you weren't trying to be funny than you are an idiot who should be called out D-bag :p

YDI for having a rabbit as a girlfriend.

StingMunFizzy 0

Um? Show that bitch what it can do.. Bet she doesn't call you little baby carrot anymore...


HahaYDI 0

Lol you have the best name ever

Hey if she likes to indulge in eating a carrot every now and then it shouldn't be too much of a problem

Tell her to do something about her wizard's sleeve, it's leaving a nasty residue on your pubes

depotst 0

bahahaha wizards sleeve

DuckOnAStick 0

My penises name is Thumper.

well shoot sweet* and random but my friend actually turned orange after eating so many carrots when we were little

STOP PENIS TANNING. lol jk fyl op

You don't control your penis size... it's just something you're born with, determined by genes. That being said. his PARENTS deserve it for giving him awful genes so that he has a tiny penis. Although I don't see why she's call it a carrot though...

Dmaster22 0

your penis is orange? JK FYL

Maybe he puts fake tan on it....

maybe he puts real tan on it ;)

Next time you go down on her, you should do your best Batman voice and say "I'm entering the Batcave.", OP.

Baby carrots aren't orange though. They are more whitish (official color name).

spidergirl41 0

Does she like carrots? Also, don't forget the ranch!!! xD

cucumberfabulous 7


Klabauterpete 0

Lol, super kawai.

JinxSNC 0

um how is this super kawaii? it's not cute at all XD

iluvevil01 11

^ omg I have the same pic in my photo album! lol

TheFadedGuitar 0

That's adorable

My ex named my penis the exact same thing, after seeing a bag of baby carrots at the grocery store. I think it's kinda funny, even though I'm insecure about my own size.

I think most guys are, tbh. I am.

Don't feel bad: it's the sex that counts, not the size. If you're good in bed, who cares?

hsumalachi 0


YDI for having a small penis

As if lack of size is the most disturbing problem! The orange color is disconcerting, but the conical, pointy shape is absolutely disgusting! Maybe the green pubes are even worse.

bexox 0

The OP must be an oompa-loompa!!! :0

... There is nothing that could ever be said to top that. Ever. You win the internet, madame.

The obvious troll is obvious

TurdMonkey 0

did you hump a stuffed rabbit in retaliation?

Hahaha I saw that FML!

evlbb2 2

Win # 9 :D Girls, please at least name our penises something awesome. Like Squirtle.

ha! squirtle FTW! you saw that one too eh?

hahha I named my boyfriend's penis blastoise. I also call it 'super soaker' sometimes.

swjeemtys 0

well atleast she is still your gf..she was just teasing.. nonetheless. fyl

mikesok988 0

Ouch bro. Maybe a nice comeback, such as "what are you gawking at, pimiento tits" is in order?