Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend started singing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML
Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML
Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML
Today, my girlfriend called my flaccid penis her "little squishy" in a voice like Dory, and became upset when I got aroused because little squishy was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML
Today, I found out that since I stopped shaving my legs, my boyfriend and his friends have started referring to me as a Wookiee. FML
Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML
Today, my date saw me naked, and was disgusted that 1. I shaved my pubes into a landing strip instead of completely bald, and 2. I missed a few hairs below my knee while shaving my legs. His actual words as he was half out the door were that he "wanted Princess Leia, not Chewbacca." FML
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Top comments
pdp_fml 21
Is she turned on by you when you have sex? I wouldn't worry about being short, if you can satisfy her in some other way.
Frelling 0
A chode in the hand is worth two in the bush.
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Comments (222)
leearm104 4
61, I doubt bringing up the dude with the one inch penis is much consolation
Islander_fml 5
Well, you can't fix the short and stubby, but you can sure trim down there. Everyone should trim down there, both boys and girls. And stubby is far better than skinny. So really, it's only the short you need to worry about, and as long as you're not too short even that isn't a problem. Try using your shorter size to convince her to do anal.
chaleighrae7 4
30-she meant pubes. I think. p
you_guys_r_fails 0
ha chode
megaaann_fml 9
At least she's still with you and doesn't leave you because of it? That's always a good thing :)
mx_17 0
you sir have a problem
Bolsters 0
Did you tell her that her ****** resembles the thing that eats Boba Fett?
chaoskiwi 0
that's hilarious!
Brendan3693 0
when you are about to climax on her face, say "Stop that ship! blast 'em!"
SpizzySpose_fml 0
Lol? Break up with that nerdy bitch. She watches Star Wars.
Brendan3693 0
Umad that nerds are smarter than you again, little troll?
sweet_candy_ 17
Nerds are cool in their own way. Don't hate.