Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
Today, my 3-year-old girl accidentally caught sight of me stepping out of the shower. Now she thinks "daddy has a tail" and she just has to let everyone know about it. FML
Today, as I got out of the shower, my young stepson saw me naked. Later, he asked his mom why my "pee pee" is so small when everyone says it is supposed to get bigger when you become an adult. FML
Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, my 5 year-old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked, "Mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?" FML
Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML
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Top comments
Crickmasta 0
I don't know what's worse; the fact that your penis is the same size as a seven year old's or that your daughter already saw a boy's penis at the age of seven, all i know is FYL
EmbalmingTheatre 0
That sucks, but maybe this boy has a really huge one and it's not so bad? And first, wow
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Comments (232)
Dhamy 0
Your daughter is starting out bad. At 7 she's seen a boys penis? Wow. I'm slightly shocked. I'm sure your penis is not the same size as Dylan's though.
foom101 0
You are forgetting about shrinkage dude! Don't worry.
FreedomFirst 0
Wow. A double whammy. On the bright side, maybe Dylan is unusually well-endowed and that's why he's showing it off. I'm wondering how long it will take my 4-year-old to realize that his is about 3 times the size it should be at his age. It's freaking scary! That kid's going to make some poor girl run away screaming when he's older.
that_guy01 0
that is just ****** up in evey possible way.
babble 0
#21 that's what I was thinking
DaftBrian 0
MAYBE...The 7 year old has a gigantic penis?
ilike269 0
WOW!! eiher that kid is really hung(for a 7 year old) or............ you've got a GREAT personality
The_Nothing 0
There are so, so many levels of wrong here. You have my total and complete pity dude. Also talk to your daughter about why she's looking at people naked. Seriously have The Talk.
ilovemycats 0
I wouldn't worry too much about it... kids are naturally curious when it comes to sexuality. It's not like the 7 year old is out there doing the nasty. Nevertheless, I'd have an honest conversation about it with her and your SO... and maybe Dylan's parents. Also, sorry about the unfortunate comparison.
mattmag 0
#24 thank your for being one of the very few people here who makes sense. seriously, none of you had seen other kids naked when you were 7? and if you've got a daughter, at least you know your penis works, even if it is tiny.