Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year-old daughter texted me from her room, "Stop." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, I was rushing around like a lunatic trying to get my shit together and knocked on my son's door a few times. The fourth time I did it, he shouted at me to just fuck off already because he’s trying to have a wank. Oops, and TMI son, TMI. FML
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Top comments
GIRAFFES 0
Wow. I blame public schools? Harrr. :B
amyzerz 0
What sort of vulgar environment are you raising your kids in? Or is it simply the way our schooling system has come to nowadays... FYL & YDI.
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Comments (880)
GIRAFFES 0
Wow. I blame public schools? Harrr. :B
Noire_ 0
Actually, you're right~! I learned the middle finger at school at the lunch table in grade 1 >.> But I learned most of my swears form my parents.
ffmmllyaya 0
god damn!
yake12 0
gotta love how there is a star on the word *******... but **** is left in the open like it is the less rude of the words
dontpanic_fml 32
haha, totally noticed this too! ******* stupid, OP...
haleyisawsomee 0
hahahahaha!!! thts priceless!! :D
Whatever80 0
Mostly Everyone Learns There Curse Words From There Parents.
RachelTheLoser 0
this is soooo messed up in the most saddest way, but because this is FML, this is hilarious xD
juni_kewl 0
yeah... my mum always says c*nt is THE WORST word to say. EVER.
nosedive1994 0
lol as Eminem says "and **** was the first word I ever learned up in the 3rd grade flipping the gym teacher the bird"
soccerdilan 0
I learned EVERYTHING in second grade
Justforlolz 14
#717 agreed. I learned ALL of my swear words from either school or TV. Blame the DOE and TV.
aulds 0
wow their smart kids
leadrunner751 3
awesome kids
emo_Onsterr 0
lol am I the only one who thinks this is funny as hell??
jjkiss 0
I was about to say that
davizv 0
why would u blame anything? these are signs of successful parenting!
djwilson50 3
wow. your name, it makes sense!
lovvee123 0
Lmaoo I was thinking the exaacttt same thing # 751!
RockNRollAndrew 18
I learned almost every curse word by kindergarten or 1st grade because of my dad being drunk.
britches 0
Whaaaaat!!!!! Kids say the darnest things :-p
trenton95 4
this guy Is gay. ^
heroesrocksmysoc 0
yuppp
jebby011 0
agreed
Giant_CornChunks 0
I can smell your britches and they're stinky, stinky britches.
sammyprosnit 8
lmbo!!!
soldierz 0
^^^^ EAGLESS WOOOOOO lol
Chaith 16
LOL. Assholes, they're getting younger .
dboy006778 0
i agree
Trolliolio 6
I believe that is what the thumb up button is for. No need to waste comment space if you're not going to say anything other than "I agree".
amyzerz 0
What sort of vulgar environment are you raising your kids in? Or is it simply the way our schooling system has come to nowadays... FYL & YDI.
21skulls 0
Holy hell.
Ar3s 1
doesn't she know not to disturb a guy taking care of business in the bathroom
funnyfml 0
lol
bobateme 0
tell my brother that, lol.
Superman1993 0
wow you must be bad, hit them up a bit that should teach them to say those words again, then was their mouth with soap
guitardedman 0
jesus. time to start paddlin' em
wowfmlife 0
failparent protip:dont let the children watch R rated movies
cnygard95 12
its not cuz of that...
imkendra 0
Where on earth are they learning to talk to one another like that?!
paramorefan125 0
ahahah it's calld public skool, gt used 2 eht waaaaaaayyyyyyyy worse in middle skool
morgantia2011 4
I do believe highschool is worse
skisftw 0
its an 8 year old jacking off what do ya expect
lelanatty 0
in my life, middle school was where kids started cursing just for the hell of it and would curse every other word just about. now that we're in highschool we're a little more mature and only do it when necessary.
Helloweentonite 0
thts rly said op... ur son-HAHAHAHA Fyl! yes public skool and YOU teach ur kids these words! shut ur mouth sometimes! or say these words in a soundproof room.. stop the jacking: -surveillance cameras -get your son counselling -put him in solitary/tie his hands behind his back _HAPPY TO HELP! _HAPPY HELLOWEEN
NancyDeebensDPDS 0
paramore125, I'm guessing you never went to school, or you didn't listen because you have the grammar skills of a hobo.
PrincesaColombia 19
hey some hobos have good grammar okay