Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML
Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML
Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for not having any friends. FML
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Today, my father was cussing loudly because he lost at a Clash Royale game. He then blamed it on me for not sending him cards, and threatened to delete me from all his social media accounts. Dad, I love you, but you're downright insane. FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML
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Top comments
sens3sfailing 25
it sounds like your dad is either awesome, or needs to quite his job as a rat farmer.
Welshite 40
Your username is "goodbye cruel world"? You brought this on yourself.
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Comments (106)
Logsterr 6
First thing is you may want a new hobby instead of video games and second you may want to make sure your dad actually is working instead of playing CoD all day.
thrAsHeRr9081 16
What's wrong with playing video games as a hobby?
Ally156 5
He probably secretly plays on it when you're not there.
Brainnnnz 19
Yet you're still swearing...
CheeseHater 23
Are you referring to "ass"? If so you should really reconsider what swearing actually is.
VaanBasch 1
Just because it's mild doesn't mean it's not swearing.
CheeseHater 23
By that logic every word in our language is a swear word. The thing about swear words is that they are supposed to be harsh. Otherwise it has no meaning at all.
fucking_dev 2
you must ******* suck .
SUPA_TOLL_CAL 6
Should have quikly installed some hacks.
barlos88 19
Go for double or nothing. See what happens...
XxFalseCrisisxX 3
Lol I laughed at this honestly. But that sucks your dad is awesome and next time make sure you get better..
rebelliousshroom 12
As a Norwegian I'm unfamiliar with this grounding concept, except from references such as this one. Are you now locked in for four weeks, or what? Do you get to go to school? If so, how does your dad enforce that you come straight home again?
rebelliousshroom 12
Ah, ok, thanks for clearing it up for me. It doesn't sound very difficult to get around, but still, a semi-formalized punishment just for swearing?? Wow. Cultural differences, I guess.
kriz_allizwell 6
Well, he went for the killstreak!
deaddonkey 15
Best dad ever