Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML
Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML
Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for not having any friends. FML
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Today, my father was cussing loudly because he lost at a Clash Royale game. He then blamed it on me for not sending him cards, and threatened to delete me from all his social media accounts. Dad, I love you, but you're downright insane. FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML
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Top comments
sens3sfailing 25
it sounds like your dad is either awesome, or needs to quite his job as a rat farmer.
Welshite 40
Your username is "goodbye cruel world"? You brought this on yourself.
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Comments (106)
Andrew910 5
Your dad pwns n00bs n gets bewbs.
Glitterhinoceros 14
Instead of hustling pool, your father hustles CoD.
olpally 33
Didn't think parents played video games as much as their kids do now a days. Lol. Stop swearing and work on your cod skills while you're grounded, n00b.
Yousuck24 21
I'm pretty sure OP won't be allowed to play COD since he's grounded...
poocherz97 3
*Sigh* At least you live in California...
alstbv12 13
California sucks.
savage93 11
Cali has Women, Weed, and Weather! What more do you need.
eddeeezzyy 19
More weed.
TrueTriage 16
Alaska MTF. Not much exists and the recreations of it aren't the same...
XxQueenofPuppets 10
California is awesome this time of year, while most other parts of the country are freezing over
MindFreakazoid 10
Try Colorado, 66. Downtown Denver is yet to be a stoner's paradise here...
jvillan87 5
I bet OP's dad plays at night when OP is sleeping. Video games aren't just for children. The average gamer is 18-40. You youngsters better watch your backs!
Dcm210 19
That's why you camp.
unknown_user5566 27
26- No. Camping is annoying as hell and defeats the purpose of the game.
biglittlehead 12
Learn how to playa game that takes some skill if that's how you think. Play Halo and you will realize what. True FPS is
Zdoggg 4
Play BF3 and realize what a real fps is. Actually halo is not bad, better then CoD, but still nothing compared to the combat and vehicles of battlefield. On that note planetside 2 just came out and is completely free and still way better then the cod and halo multiplayer
Zdoggg 4
And ya, camping is for pussys.
FMLJFL 5
Because you know, they aren't playing split screen....
wickedninja918 1
No you just don't make bets like that unless you're actually good at cod (jokeing or not).
perdix 31
Pong, Space Invders, QBert, Galaga, Pac-Man, pinball, skee-ball,... Need I go on?
Link7130 4
It's a sad, sad day for a "gamer" when his own father beats him at a modern video game. You suck.
florido_fml 10
People are just pissed off today and thumping everyone down... Good comment thumps up haha =D
charlton2142 5
This is the best fml I have ever read!
perdix 31
How did you not know your dad had mad skillz at CoD? You never make bets like this unless you know you are going to win.