By skiittlez713 - 20/05/2011 08:40 - United States

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 226
You deserved it 16 539

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Top comments

THISISCITRUS 0

"But you are."

TheDrifter 23

Are you sure it wasn't the fully shaved look combined with the Dora the explorer panties?

Comments

THISISCITRUS 0

"But you are."

futtbuck101 1

I'll do it

Make it a three way I'm in too.

PurpleRae420 0

Your boyfriends a pussy

no your bf is a penis because you are what you eat and hes not eating pussy

raven02 0

that's a legit excuse baby lotion u should of smelled like champagne......

I can certainly understand his sentiments...

TheDrifter 23

Champagne? That crap smells like rotten apples. She should have smelled like Henney.

That's a pretty good excuse. I'm gonna try that one next time.

iAmScrubs 19

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

DEODORANT FOR VAGS.

RedPillSucks 31

Baby oil doesn't smell bad and it's not only used for babies. I'm thinking most guys wouldn't know what it smelled like. I think your boyfriend may very well have gone down on a few well oiled underaged girls

TalkinSmack 6

u don't need deoderant ... it's called SOAP! wash ur junk once in a while and it won't stink... hello!

Not soap, use Vagisil! South park reference, anyone?

she didnt say it stunk. she said it smelled like baby oil which could have been used AFTER she showered. hello!

sourgirl101 28

Yep, just take a shower together and offer to shampoo his hair....and while he's down on his knee! etc.... Two birds with one stone.(:

iAmScrubs 19

I failed on my comment. I'm sorry.

TempestRain 0

She said "baby lotion" not "baby oil". While baby oil doesn't have a distinct smell, baby lotion does. Anyone who has every held a baby can probably recall the smell of baby lotion. I can understand the problem for her bf. I would have a hard time being intimate if baby's kept popping in my head!

^^yes the first step is admitting it

wikkedphuka 0

calm down now u no u cant post comments on fml till uv had ur vagisil lol #southpark

I scream u scream we all scream for vagina cream

I need some vagisil Jackie Chan

Phel 0

In that case, can I go down on you? If he is too chicken shit, then I will have too

enonymous 8

I agree there are dozens of us on the Internet willing to make up for this. it also helps that you smell like a young boy. You can check our profiles out on meganslaw

#80 is a solid win.

TalkinSmack 6

why did u put baby lotion on ur junk?

TalkinSmack 6

thanks :) lol

ReynshineCutting 10

I'm thinking she probably put it on her legs after shaving so it was in the general vicinity.

mandywaffles 0

Maybe she used baby soap? It says she smelled of baby lotion, not that she actually put it on.

fatalkiss 0

That's kinda cute, actually. And wouldn't you rather it be this, then you smelling of dead fish & him refusing?

Phel 0

Um... U should get that checked out

That was a 'what if', smarty. Try again.

Cute? Since when and in which world is "I don't want to give my girlfriend pleasure because I am a wussy." cute? Point is, he is refusing whilst I dare to bet his penis doesn't smell like roses either.

An unwashed vagina not smell like dead fish (if your vagina has a fishy scent, you need to go to a gyno), it smells like sweat and sex. Which leads to stranger issues if your BF doesn't like the scent of sex...

juicedboi 7

Well if he is refusing from this, he must be cheating and this is an excuse!!! right girls!!!!!

TheDrifter 23

The smell of rancid sweat and vaginal fluid does indeed smell a lot like fish... walking past the doors to the women's locker room at the gym always makes me hungry.

fthku 13

Wussy, you say, Djeepee? Hmm. I rolled a magic 8-Ball and asked him what 90% of the comments to the following theoretical FML would be like. And can you argue with a magic 8-Ball? "Today, my girlfriend refused to go down on me, because she doesn't like the way my penis smells, for her own private reason. FML" "WOW U R A DOUCHEBAG IF DATS ALL U TINK ABOT" "WASH YOUR PENIS" "If she doesn't want to go down on you, it's her choice! respect her" "Clearly you have no sense of hygene, 'cause you are a man, and if she doesn't like the smell she has every right not to go down on you!" "Even if you don't agree with her reason, you have to respect it! blabla" I hate hypocrites. Especially when it comes to men-women, religion and Justin Bieber.

lmao!!!! ^ u do know how we think!

He Definately needs a mental check!

@ fthk, I also think that women who don't want to go down on their boyfriend because 'it smells funny' are wussies. So no, I'm not an hypocrite. The big problem I have with this FML is that baby lotion actually smells nice. The fact that OP's boyfriend linked it with being a child molester simply sounds like a weak excuse to me.

fthku 13

The problem is, this is *subjective*, Djeepee. You seem very intolerant to what just doesn't happen to apply for you. Basically, you're saying "This does not bother me, so it shouldn't bother anyone else, and if it does heshe's a wussy". A very immature statement. By what right do you tell anyone what can bother him, and what can't? You admitted yourself on a certain something , regarding sex, in the past. Would it be my place to say that you don't really love your boyfriend? that you're just making excuses? Just because baby lotion wouldn't bother you, does not mean it doesn't bother other people. I know I wouldn't want to smell something that reminded me of my baby sister while having sex.

wannbaussiegurl 4

oh shit!

TheDrifter 23

Are you sure it wasn't the fully shaved look combined with the Dora the explorer panties?

imcutefml 0

u sir are a winner

Sounds like an excuse to me...

horridromance 7

Agreed

sourgirl101 28

I've heard of "some" guys freaking out over a Brazilian wax because of that. (They at least want a landing stripe.) Your boyfriend takes it to a whole new level of WOW! WTF!!!

that's weird! Brazilian waxes are the only way to go. shows that the girl made effort and it's more of a turn on

sourgirl101 28

Oh, I said "some" not "most".(: You Sir, understand clearly one reason it's done!

RedPillSucks 31

A landing strip? More like training wheels.... "Where do I put this thing!!???" "Oh there's the convenient strip" I think I want my next girlfriend to shave "This way in" into her vag hairs....

sourgirl101 28

RPS, it's better than crop circles!

Why not just a downward pointing arrow? XD

ReynshineCutting 10

I'm trying to picture crop circles and it's just too funny. What the heck is with vajazzling? And why does anyone need to dye it bright colors? Seems like such a waste of money to me.

iReadFmlsFml 0

27, you just gave me a great idea....

Vajazzling: a full brazilian, then they stick sparkly skin stickers on it. Personally I feel it looks disturbingly paedo, cause most of the people I know used sparkly skin stickers (not down there) when they were 10.

it has been discovered that due to the uncleanliness of some salons, HPV has been know to be transferred by waxing, just so you know

OhbbyCx 6

I love you. XDDD

hairless is the only way. I hate hair in my teeth.

At least you now know that he's NOT a child molester right?

I don't know. A lot of times you'll find when people become overly defensive/sensitive about a topic it's because they're trying to suppress something they don't want to admit/others to suspect. Many outward homophobes are likely closet homosexuals