Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I received a text from my boyfriend telling me how much I wore him out the night before, from all the sex we were having. We had sex for two minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my husband and orgasmed. Three hours apart from each other. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Cavebone 5
that's a solid 50% improvement.
DalPozzo13 10
That's sad, my dog has gotten it on with a pillow longer than that haha
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (229)
GabrielJ 0
Even my first time was 45 minutes! Better luck next time!
ilove80smetal 8
Way to go quick draw :P
FUCKNAMESBREH 0
Lol, fail.
picturescrazy 24
Story of my life :'(
LouisianaBob 9
Practice will solve that
linkinpark98 24
At least he didn't lie to you :D
chris20579 1
At least it was longer lol
musicluvr2000 11
At least he is honest I'd take honesty over getting your hopes up too high any day
Timmeeh 17
Get him some of those Durex performa things. An ex girlfriend once jokingly bet that she could get me off while I was wearing one. She could not. I'm really not convinced it's even possible to climax while wearing one, it may just be the answer to your prayers.
hayturr 1
I've been in your shoes.. Get rid of him, trust me. Best decision i ever made!
doubleohseven 0
Awe,op,