Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I received a text from my boyfriend telling me how much I wore him out the night before, from all the sex we were having. We had sex for two minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, after 6 months of sex, my boyfriend showered himself with praise for managing, for the first time ever, to stretch the act out to a full minute. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my husband and orgasmed. Three hours apart from each other. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
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Top comments
Cavebone 5
that's a solid 50% improvement.
DalPozzo13 10
That's sad, my dog has gotten it on with a pillow longer than that haha
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Comments (229)
jmoose311 3
You shouldn't be having sex outside of marriage. YDI.
THE_A_TEEN 28
What the hell? Who the hell are you to tell some complete stranger over the internet what to do and what not to do with their intimate relationship? Don't even be in the intimacy section if you hate people having sex before marriage.
LangleyBoi 0
He's shit lol
MrsCunny 1
It's cause it felt so good I guess. I wouldn't know. :P it's a sign of Happiness
franwins0827 7
Convince him to spend more time on foreplay - if you've already gotten yours by the time he puts it in, it won't matter how quick he gets his after that.
alextherussian 0
Woowww I didn't know guys could last that short time :/ it takes me like 45 min every time and I thought that was fast :/
aron666 25
Don't worry OP, a quicky comes handy sometimes
Meggers1 0
Ever heard of condoms?
Devor 5
I hate my minuite man :L
hurrican_fml 0
At least that's improvement right?
kurtap 0
Haha fail