Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single Ladies" by Beyonce came on; the DJ came on the mic and said "Single ladies raise your hands!" My girlfriend raised her hand. FML
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When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while at the club, I started dancing with a girl who I had noticed throughout the night. When she turned around she firmly stated, "I'd much rather dance by myself". FML
Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML
Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML
Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML
Today, my boyfriend convinced a girl at the club to break up with her boyfriend and go home with him. She did. Now I'm single too. FML
Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML
Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
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Top comments
darkfaery 0
If you two are not married, then technically, she IS single. And if you don't want her to be single, then you ought to put a ring on it!
Carolaaine 0
As long as she doesn't try to kiss another boy (or boyS) you're quite safe.. It's just a song
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Comments (155)
Nofuckyourlife 1
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Thats what you get for going to clubs that play awful music. Seriously, Beyonce? Jesus.
tsim_fml 0
no thats what he gets for not saying "my girlfriend and i"
heyyitslo 6
hahaha go grammar nazis!
bluerara912 12
I agree the club scene is beyond stupid
Riku714 25
You mean "that's" what he gets. You may be a grammar nazi but you need work on your punctuation good Sir.
threer 30
Grammar altogether, actually...
Carolaaine 0
As long as she doesn't try to kiss another boy (or boyS) you're quite safe.. It's just a song
Sgt_Minty 0
Look at the name "dumpedattheclub" DUMPED at the club
Jschro14 0
My girl loves that song and it makes me laugh every time I hear it too. Not really FML though. She was just into the song.
frolick123 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
dont call her ur girl... ur 12 kid and ofc she loves that song... cuz shes 12...
shutterbug1190 14
Dudes 23.... Lol...
MrsDruidess 23
the song is about marriage so yeah, in the context of the song, shes single.
zoomster 0
definitely not an fml
Kick62 0
You're an insecure manchild, she is having some fun at a club, she's not blowing some guy in front of you
Jbiebs82 0
I luv ur pic
Jbiebs82 0
Everyone thinks your insecure.. and not an fml.. IT'S NOT AN FML!! She was havig fun!
darkfaery 0
If you two are not married, then technically, she IS single. And if you don't want her to be single, then you ought to put a ring on it!
ryguy1997 0
no not true if you are in a bf gf you are in a relationship so yeah go check your reasoning.
mathewneill 0
ryguy you totally missed the point.have you got no sense of humour?
skizzlerz 0
actually yes she is technically single. at weddings they ask for all single women to catch the bouquet, and women with boyfriends are included in that.
King_of_Kings 3
i second #1
jessywoo 0
Not an FML
trop_fml 0
it's just the song! not an FML
badddninja 0
does she know shes ur girlfriend?
PoopNuggetLeader 4
Lol, I believe people did not understand your joke.
comment11111 39
I did :) hilarious