Today, it's my birthday. I've been dropping strong hints all year about wanting to learn to tap-dance, hoping for some decent tap shoes. Instead, I got a beekeepers outfit and some furry dice to hang on my wreck of a car's rear-view mirror. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, it's my birthday. My mom got me a gym membership and a bunch of clothes that are a few sizes too small. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My parents got me a box of cupcakes. My brother got me a deck of cards. My aunt got me a brochure on how to quit smoking. I have diabetes, I don't play cards, and I don't smoke. FML
Today, I had dinner with my family in celebration of my 19th Birthday. I've been hinting that I need a new laptop for months now and I was sure my family had bought me one. I have got a pair of slipper socks. FML
Today, it's my birthday, and apparently my family forgot it. But one person didn't forget. My dog gave me a little present in my new shoes I bought for myself. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML
Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML
Today, it's my birthday. So far I have received: the news that my parents are divorcing, a dead bird and a pile of shit left on my bed (courtesy of the cat), a rash all over my face, and some slippers from my boyfriend. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom." That's how he put it, anyway. FML
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Top comments
Olovio 5
Atleast yoy didn't get a bloody handjob!
Buttsexpirate 9
I guess when you said that you wanted to be the bees knees, they took it the wrong way
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Comments (114)
revengePanda 0
Get parts off your wrecked car, place them on the bottom of your shoes, go to your bees without a suit on. Each sting will bring you one step closer to being the dancer you have always wanted to be.
XxDancerGirlxX 17
Great advice!
music87 14
LOL
vashthestampede 0
At least you GOT gifts...
ikickgingers 15
Tap-dance ? People still do that?
Richard16 0
Good luck on Christmas (this time tell them exactly wat you want)
emsbitch 0
oh you must be irish. stop breaking tradition!
Feklfekl2222 32
Indian
Feklfekl2222 32
Become a motorised tap dancing beekeeper! Simples *meerkat sound*
bwenduh45 7
Look at the bright side now you can, put on your bee suit, go get some bees , and put it in their backyard. :)
lolfish1337 4
Furry dice! That's badass!!
yumsugarr 8
Sounds like fun . Happy Birthday! (:
THE_A_TEEN 28
Well... HAPPY B-DAY ANYWAY HER THAT RHYMES