At least he got one of his resolutions done. That's quite admirable in my opinion.

Well, that's a new one!

*cock juggling thundercunt

Penis monger.

Individual of ill manners.

Butt goblin?

Cum guzzler

For some reason 2's picture just makes this so much better

cockholster..

I'm sticking to asscandle. God, I love that word.

This is as subjective as it can get.

sperm nugget?

Asscandle? Asshat? Assfucker? Assbottle?

Ass muncher, Ass strangler, Ass puppet, Ass gremlin.....

fuckass

Maybe excrement delivery system. :(

#5, that's what adjectives and adverbs are for.

Ass cricket

Fucking ass dick prick

Cum guzzling ass muncher?

May I interest you in a 2011 Douchenozzle with dual overhead cams and 9, count 'em, 9 cup holders? It's more powerful than even a 2013 Asshole.

shithead

Why is he an asshole?

Is it just me or does #6 apologize in a lot of her comments?

OP's husband's name is life? That's pretty awesome.

When life gives you lemons, find a kid with a papercut.

I know someone named Leif. It's pronounced as life, though. It's pretty cool, too.

sometimes, you eat the bear, and sometimes, well, he eats you.

When life gives me lemons, I make beef stew.

Just make sure to put those lemons to good use. Lemon grenades perchance

given*

96- sorry,I didn't notice my mistake