FML : Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she...

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Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Ohshit - / Sunday 17 May 2009 06:42 / United States

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Top comments

By dmipotc | 0

#205718 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:07

how often does your mom rub your "very erect penis"? ur instinctive reaction freaks me out

By youaresofucked | 0

#205716 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:06

OOOOHHH NO!

Comments

By youaresofucked | 0

#205716 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:06

OOOOHHH NO!

Reply

chromeLegend | 0

#975950 - Wednesday 7 April 2010 20:36

muddafukka

Reply

roobz_fml | 0

#988199 - Tuesday 4 May 2010 10:22

sounds like someone was harrassed when he was younger...

Reply

Aero_boy | 4

#1212987 - Monday 9 August 2010 17:53

"recalling how she smelled like peppermint" yeah, sure. xD.

Reply

TheWhiteDemon | 0

#1266397 - Thursday 19 August 2010 4:03

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Reply

yoyoforpeace | 14

#4767970 - Friday 3 August 2012 14:19

I would've said, "yes sweetie?" heh heh

By TwistedDaydream | 0

#205717 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:06

x_x Argh. You weren't too careful there were you?

Reply

novakman | 0

#885319 - Tuesday 23 February 2010 15:23

brutal

Reply

llScarlFacell | 0

#970813 - Tuesday 30 March 2010 2:35

Meh, no biggie. I say all sorts of stupid things when I just wake up. One time I got up and after comming to some sense my mom told me I had just said, " Pensylvania. I got the bling bling baby. "

Reply

Larryfresh23 | 0

#1425555 - Sunday 19 September 2010 6:39

at least he didn't say dad
right

By dmipotc | 0

#205718 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:07

how often does your mom rub your "very erect penis"? ur instinctive reaction freaks me out

Reply

VampireKiller59 | 0

#977909 - Sunday 11 April 2010 17:47

dont say anything just enjoy the handjob

Reply

FML_accounT123 | 5

#4200972 - Thursday 22 March 2012 18:19

He said he thought it was his mom because of the smell, not the rubbing

Reply

obnum | 19

#5397309 - Friday 8 March 2013 16:28

Yeah idk about you guys, but when I just wake up I'm not very alert. Sometimes my mind notices one thing and skips over another

By Davidscd | 0

#205724 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:12

WTF are you still with the girlfriend!? or....with mummy?

By 24788 | 6

#205725 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:12

lol, that's just creepy.

By connerfusion | 0

#205727 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:15

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

By neverland_fml | 0

#205728 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:16

Ooh, that's gonna be difficult to explain. DX

By readme | 0

#205732 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:19

Think Dear...Think!

You won't be waking up to anymore early morning surprises thanks to that!

By circayouandme | 0

#205734 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:20

Erm.... why would you call out your mother? That's incest, man.

By arienh4 | 0

#205738 - Sunday 17 May 2009 12:22

#4 Serves you right? Implying he had a choice, had that happened?

Reply

dragonvale19 | 12

#6177097 - Monday 19 January 2015 7:13

What did he sa.... Oh... Nvm... I feel so lonely in the future.

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