Today, I went to get an ultrasound done. I texted my ex, who's the father, and told him how adorable its little feet are, and asked him why he didn't come. I got a reply with two words: "DNA test". FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Same thing different taste
Bad news
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Mix up
Today, my husband presented me with a DNA test proving that our newborn daughter isn't his. Confused, I got her tested again. She's not a match to me either. FML
WTF dude?
Today, after a dangerous and painful emergency caesarean, I received an SMS from a guy I turned down for a date, saying he was crying and so excited to meet 'our' baby. I've barely even shaken hands with this guy. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend, saying, "Hi." His response was, "I got your best friend pregnant." FML
Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
Today, I got a text message from my ex from about a year ago, asking if my 4-day-old son was his. I don't know what's sadder - the fact that he thinks a gestation period can last 11 months, or that he's more willing to step up to the plate than the baby's actual father. FML
Today, I went and had my first ultrasound done. My husband said he had a meeting at work, and couldn't come. As I was leaving, I saw him at the doctor's office with another heavily pregnant woman. FML
No kidding
Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML
Family coincidence
Today with a DNA test, I found out that my husband is my half brother. 30 years ago his father made a donation to the sperm bank my mother used, and I’m the result. To make matters worse, I’m pregnant. FML
Top comments
ChelzTheWolfGirl 29
Well if that's what it takes to prove to him it's his, I'd say do it. It's hard being a single mom.
steve31789 8
Well unless you gave him a reason to think otherwise, guy sounds pretty immature. If you can have sex you should know the consequences of it also
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Comments (201)
ChelzTheWolfGirl 29
Well if that's what it takes to prove to him it's his, I'd say do it. It's hard being a single mom.
LCPLStewie 23
What does the OP have to lose? might as well go through with it and have no doubt about it.
Kamon97 23
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Still YDI on her part for not using protection before marriage...
minauto 15
you don't actually know that. protection fails sometimes...
slooby_fml 25
#1 - A DNA test can cost $100-$500 dollars. Unless he's paying for it, I wouldn't waste my money on it. #35 - They might have used protection and it just didn't work. You don't know that they didn't use protection.
slooby_fml 25
God dammit I did the stupid redundant "dollars" mistake. My sincerest apologies, It's 7:16 AM and I'm tired. Please forgive me.
SharnaaaBanana 22
Do the DNA test. They may be costly but so is raising a child. If you prove him as the father he has to pay child support.
slooby_fml 25
#53 - That's true. I didn't think about child support. Even better if he's willing to pay for the test, though.
ksks1234 33
55-- OP can make him pay for the DNA test. Maybe when the baby comes, the father will grow up and be a great dad and no DNA test will be needed.
graceinsheepwear 34
35, how do you know it's not her ex-husband? In any case, why are you judging her?
flame5768 14
yeah, i'm going to pay for a test in FULL, and then if i fail even though i want NEARLY NOTHING to do with this baby i'll have to pay. and i mean have to. the ******* county makes you. how logical is that? (role playing not the bf)
emirie 21
Actually you could go through family court. You could demand child support and if he wants a DNA test he'll have to pay for it if the child is his.
breakinlegs 19
Yes, he may just be a total loser guy. It is probably all his fault and he isn't manning up....or maybe she is an ex cause she is a cheater, maybe she "forgot" to take her birth control pills. All I'm saying is this type of scenario is happening all to often these days. I feel bad for the kids to be.
eyepuppy 31
there's really not enough information from this fml. she might be a cheater, which would give him the right to be leery. he also might just be a deadbeat guy who wants to make the situation so complicated for her that she just doesn't push child support.
carterjanelle 9
Exactly
rocker_chick23 27
#35: my 6 year old is a condom/BC baby.
dragonkisses28 25
I had to do a DNA test when I applied for child support because the "man" denied the baby was his. They made him pay for the test.
ChelzTheWolfGirl 29
the cost of a DNA test is a lot cheaper than raising a kid by yourself. It would be awesome if he paid for it, but either way it's good to get one if that's what it takes to get some help raising a kid.
billie_joann 10
Lol it's "sex before marriage" not "you can have sex but just use protection before you get married" maybe they did use protection, nothing is 100% unless you're celibate.
squideth 18
35 I always find it so hilarious that, in other FMLs, you whine and complain that you're a nice guy and that girls won't date you. Then you proceed to be a massive sexist douche. Hmm I wonder if there's a correlation? It takes two to make a baby. It's not suddenly all the woman's fault when she gets knocked up.
steve31789 8
Well unless you gave him a reason to think otherwise, guy sounds pretty immature. If you can have sex you should know the consequences of it also
SneezyBear 27
Not that unreasonable a request imo if OP wants him to pay child support, considering all the horror stories of men who've paid child support for years and years before finding out their 'child' isn't biologically theirs. Especially if the breakup happened to be a bitter one, I can understand why OP's ex may want to be 100% certain. Cuz keep in mind not all people who 'give reasons to think otherwise' are actually lying/cheating, while some people who are excellent at covering their tracks turn out to be doing just that.
littlem91 29
That's the logical argument, but she's probably excited about her baby, so unless she's given him reason to think she's a cheater, it would be pretty hurtful. Presumably it's a pretty recent break up.
SneezyBear 27
#9 I'll admit the timing was terrible, lol.
DancinL 14
The way OP texted him about how cute the baby's feet were makes me think the breakup wasn't bitter.
SneezyBear 27
#71 Maybe. Or maybe she's dealing with it a lot better than he is. I mean for instance, she seems to be looking forward to her baby, that's one way to get your mind off a painful breakup. Or maybe he's just a douche. Not assuming anything here, just throwing around possibilities.
monagro 22
Sex =/= kids anymore. Birth control prevents this, and you if this fails, you can get an abortion. Therefore, it is a choice if sex leads to children now. Hence it should be his choice if he wants anything to do with it.
baseballbv 17
105, you're a bright and shining example of America. Treating a baby like a toy or gadget. If you want it, keep it, if not just get rid of it. You don't just irresponsibly have sex and then decide if you don't want a baby, kill it. There's always adoption. You make me sick.
carterjanelle 9
"Throwing around possibilities" translates into making multiple assumptions -_-
diaspora_fml 26
(#71) ... or that she is delusional and proceeding with her master plan for "true love" that started with her initial entrapment, pretending to take birth control, and poking holes in condoms for all the times he tried to escape the crazy. None of us knows what is going on in any way.
CaitiieBuggs 23
105- you don't know OP's or the ex's stance on that stuff. Just because those options are available doesn't mean they want those options. And the ex made his choice of involvement when he chose to help make it. Just because he's asking for a DNA test doesn't necessarily mean he wants OP to get an abortion. And if he did want her to and she didn't, that's too bad for him. His body isn't the one that has to go through with it. If he didn't want a baby he should have thought about that first. Even with all the protection in the world, things still happen. That's part of risk and resposibility of sex.
rocker_chick23 27
#105 I have to tell you that not everyone with birth control failures and unplanned pregnancies want abortions. Yes abortion is an option, but it seems OP is super excited to be a mother. I doubt abortion is an option for her.
zarosian 17
#105, Birth Control doesn't always works just reduces the chance of having a child
JBChristian 47
#105, you may see nothing wrong with abortion, and yes it's an option, just like telling a lie is an option but it's not good. In the eyes of many, including myself, abortion is murdering innocent and helpless children.
sweetest_jenn 18
Looks like you passed one test and he'll pass the next. He wants to play that game? Text him back with two words as well: Child support!
sweetest_jenn 18
She said it's his baby...
sweetest_jenn 18
We don't know her in real life. You can choose to take her word for it, or you can decide for yourself that she's a liar. Realistically speaking, a DNA test is probably not one of her biggest concerns now that she has to prep herself to be responsible for a baby that she's likely going to be raising singlehandedly, with or without a child support check that will barely pay for diapers.
sweetest_jenn 18
Beside, paternity test seems like an inescapable option for her anyways, if she wants help her at all and/or wants her child to have a father figure. Sadly, this is the world we live in.
sweetest_jenn 18
Perhaps it was naive of me to believe her. But without knowing someone personally, I find it hard to harshly comment on a situation where someone might already be going through some tough times and needed a few positive words from someone. I do share your beliefs, don't get me wrong. But I try to reserve my rationalities and cynicism for people I know in real life :)
sweetest_jenn 18
It's not a sin to sympathize or empathize. Most of the people you've deemed stupidly sensitive are people who still believe in honesty. In assuming that OP was telling the truth, they chose to offer words of encouragement. I personally don't see anyone wrong with it, despite knowing there are people out there who will look down on me for it.
sweetest_jenn 18
OP wasn't out to earn your trust. Your trust isn't beneficial to her or anyone else here. And honesty isn't fickle. The heart is fickle but morals and values doesn't have to change because of it. It is lack of sympathy that makes the world a hard place to live in. I strongly believe OP just needed a place to lament and get a few words of encouragement from strangers. It needn't come to this since she's the only one who has to deal with the details of her predicament. You've really blown this out of proportions.
SunTzu2 9
How about statistics that say 1 in five children are born/raised to men that believe they're the biological father. But aren't. Simple blood group tests suffice to prove this fact
ohmandapants 17
I don't think he ever said that OP needed to earn HIS trust, and I don't see how this has been blown out of proportion because all of his arguments were valid and very true to the situation. If OP is confident that her ex is the father then this shouldn't be a problem for her. I don't get why everyone is so quick to jump on the "he's a selfish douche" bandwagon. You know what, sometimes women are manipulative, selfish bitches. I'm not saying that OP is, she could be very innocent in all this but it's really not unreasonable to ask for a DNA test from your EX. If they were currently together then I'd understand it being hurtful.
SneezyBear 27
sweetest jenn, you're not the one who faces paying child support for 18 years. I'm an optimistic person and I believe that the majority of people try their best to be kind and honest, but so long as stores still require you to bring in a receipt as proof of purchase in order to get a refund for a $10 stuffed toy, a man has every right to make 100% sure that he's not wasting tens of thousands of dollars on someone else's baby. Personally, I don't think it's realistically possible to have 100% unwavering trust in your partner, let alone your ex.
arandomusernameaa 20
Just stop talking.
Scynistr 20
@enma. If I get downvoted.. Fine. I just have to tell you that you're awesome.
isuckwithnames 22
Too bad OP wasn't. I'm sorry I'm really tired and had to make the joke.
sweetest_jenn 18
I never said I don't think OP and her ex shouldn't get a DNA test. I don't think she has a choice. What prompted this whole thing was the fact that I based my comments on believing that OP has no reason to lie about who her baby-daddy is. If she is, that's her business and she'll live with the consequences. That's all!!
gracehi 33
Don't know why you two are arguing. If the DNA proves that OP's ex isn't the father, then obviously he wouldn't be obligated to pay child support. However, OP must have a reason for saying her ex is the father with such confidence. It's not as if she has to prove anything to us, a bunch of anonymous strangers online who can't influence her life at all.
PassiveAggresive 12
Scenarios: 1: She accepts to take a DNA test, finds out her ex isn't the father. (He broke up with her because she had a one night stand) 2: She accepts to take a DNA test, finds out her ex is the father. After the ex gets 100% certainty, he is open to taking care of the child in a co-parenting system. (They broke up mutually) Both of those don't involve child support. All he wants to know is who the father is. Try and think why they're not together anymore.
PassiveAggresive 12
Exactly, and even if he is the father, he never said he wasn't going to take care of the child by co-parenting. Also, what if from court he gains full custody and since he makes less than the mother, she has to pay child support. Such double standards. The man isn't always the one who pays child support. Depending on the circumstances, it can be the other way around.
DanielleinDC 34
And maybe he cheated on her, so she dumped him--before or after she knew she was pregnant is immaterial--but still wants him to be part of their child's life, and he is just being an absolute douche nozzle for whatever reason. It sounds as if he took the breakup worse than she did.
ohmandapants 17
Please explain how he is being a douche? It would be great if you could provide valid arguments. Because nowhere does it say that he doesn't want to be a part of the child's life. He's asking his ex for a paternity test I don't think that's exactly absurd.
gracehi 33
157, I don't think it's the mere fact that he's asking for a DNA test that is douchy, but the way he did it. She texts him about the baby, clearly excited and happy, and he replies with a two word text demanding proof that the child is his. It's understandable that he'd want proof, but you should treat the person with whom you may be raising a child with respect. To me, a DNA test seems like something you should ask for in person, or at least over the phone if that's not possible, or maybe even a letter or email. In any case, I don't think one should ask for something like that in a medium as impersonal as a text, especially if you've had a relationship with the person. It would be sort of like telling someone you're pregnant with their child in as few words as possible in a text. "I'm pregnant. It's yours." Imagine finding out that you're going to be a parent or that the father of your child is questioning the baby's parentage that way. That would suck.
jackycat 17
#3 In a lot of states you can't force child support from a guy if you aren't married at the time of the birth and then there isn't a DNA test proving he's the father. The guy can willingly sign an affidavit that he's the father, but I highly doubt he's going to do that.
ohmandapants 17
#161 well we don't know that he hasn't brought this up before, and she hasn't gone through with it. We also don't know that she didn't tell him she was pregnant by text. We really don't know much. Yeah maybe he was a little blunt and rude but we don't know how OP has acted either except for this "happy" text.
jackycat 17
161 My coworker refuses to hear anything from her son about his maybe daughter after catching the mother texting other guys (the girl also lies constantly about many other things, like her age). When ever he tries to guilt her with their money problems (she caught the girl while she was letting the girl live with her rent free) by sending her baby updates she just a asks him if they're done the cheek swab yet. Maybe OP's ex has repeatedly told her he wants nothing to do with the baby/pregnancy until he has proof it's his.
gracehi 33
You're right. We don't know the whole situation. I'm just explaining why this guy's behavior is, or could be considered, douchie.
sweetbliss3 37
not everyone ***** around when they're with someone. so if hes the one she was with , then yes, the baby would be the exes. but if he wants one so bad, then make him pay for it along with child support. takes two to make a baby. and if he doesnt take him to court to make him pay. it's as much his responsibility as it is yours. good luck
Robtranis 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well, now you know he's not ready. Don't pressure him too much. :D
xx000o 27
It doesn't matter if he's ready or not. If he didn't want to face the possibility of being in this position, he should have used protection.
glabberfasted 16
I really hate pregnancy FMLs because it always brings up the whole stupid "protection" debate. There is no 100% prevention for pregnancy, other than abstinence and infertility. Condoms, birth control, etc, are not 100% effective, and you can still get pregnant using them.
imagineapc 11
Thank you #15! I would also like to point out that I'm not aware of even one couple who has a healthy and loving relationship yet abstains from sex.
spoo 24
South Park explains ear sex is pregnancy proof
Somefruits 24
Even sterilization isn't 100%! My mum got her tubes tied then got pregnant with my younger sister not long after.
baseballbv 17
So you're saying that sex is the sole component of whether or not a relationship is healthy and happy? I've been with my fiancée about a year now without sex (waiting until marriage) and we have a lot happier and healthier relationship than a lot of other couples we know. It really just depends on the people involved. Sex is important but it's not the be all and end all factor of happy relationships.
horneyhic 15
Infertility is not perfect either my cousin was told she could never have kids...now she has a 6 month old daughter
jackycat 17
116 Studies have proven that a bad sex life can undo a previously good relationship.
baseballbv 17
165, studies have shown that pet dragons can solve issues with enemies and that waving your hand over dirt can make gold. I have a study for any situation.
squideth 18
That's cute 184. But that study is true. Surprisingly, what works for you and your relationship doesn't work for everyone.
baseballbv 17
215, I understand that. That's why I make sure to say it depends on the people in the relationship. I just think that sex is overrated and people use it as a vice. Lots of couples use sex as a way of not communicating and in those cases makes relationships more poisonous and unhealthy.
JuzReading 23
It's obvious he's just scared that he's got a little one he's responsible for. I hope he comes around and sees that children can be wonderful :)
JuzReading 23
Fair enough point. But even if OP's ex doesn't turn out to be the father, the OP feels comfortable enough to invite him to see her baby's ultrasound in hope of support which seems to be the least he could do.
Kergami 18
Once you get the DNA test and he still acts that way, Child support.
DeadPixel4 29
I'd say do it. It's worth it, the child needs a father, and it's hard to do it alone.
ksks1234 33
I completely agree with 54. No amount of child support (actually paid) can make up for the pain of hearing your kid say, "he promised he would be here". If the father (or mother) doesn't want to be there, it is probably better that they are not involved.
Setareh23 34
#89 A father can pay child support without being physically present in the child’s life. I totally agree with #54 that a child deserves a father who wants to be in their life. If the father wants nothing to do with the child and he’s just going to treat it like dirt, then there’s no need to force him to be present. It’s his choice. But just because he doesn’t want to spend time with the kid or get to know him/her, doesn’t mean he can get out of paying child support. He has certain responsibilities too.
ksks1234 33
186-- unfortunately, if the father is a loser, he usually will not pay child support. And, unfortunately, I know of a few non-custodial parents that take the kid just to spite the custodial parent because they are 'forced' to pay child support, then ignore the kid.
jazzlejay 8
What a douche, but hey it's his loss
ohmandapants 17
He's not saying that he doesn't want to be a part of the child's life and I honestly don't think it's all that unreasonable for an ex to ask for a DNA test. They could have been broken up for a little while before OP realised she was pregnant, we don't know the circumstances surrounding their situation. If he's the father then OP has nothing to lose by taking the DNA test.
Bigfabthetruth52 22
that tends to be my mode of thinking on these situations as well but based on the fml its seemed like it had already been established that she was pregnant before this and she was just sharing her happiness with him and then he just rudely tells her that.also i agree we don't know everything that's happened between them and something could have happened to push him to ask that.
ohmandapants 17
See I didn't get that at all, I feel like nothing was established and possibly that there wasn't much discussion on the issue (pretty much what #26 said down below). I think there's absolutely nothing wrong with him asking his ex to prove that it's his baby. If you're going to be committed to someone for 18+ years I think you have a right to know if it's actually yours, especially if you're not in a committed relationship with the person claiming it's your baby. And also for all we know OP could have done something to make him respond in that "rude" way, I'm not so quick to say that she's just innocent and happy. She could be, but again we don't know.
Bigfabthetruth52 22
i understand your point about him having reasons to wanting to know those things.but what I'm saying is based off of what was said in the fml it seemed as if they talked about it at some point before and that she was just starting a friendly chat with him which was followed by his remark. the reason i thought that is because it sounds a little odd for her to start off the first conversation of pregnancy to him by simply describing how cute its feet were.that's why it appeared to me they had to talk about it at some point before that text.either that or she had a pretty weird way of bringing up that subject up to him.
ohmandapants 17
But maybe he had brought up this paternity request before? And she hasn't followed through which is why he gave her such a blunt response? I really don't feel like these two ever had a real discussion about it. She could have dropped this bomb on him last week or yesterday for all we know...I'm not necessarily saying she did any wrong doing on her part, but I'm saying that there's also nothing wrong with his request. We don't know what happened so I'm not gonna say she's innocent and take her side and say that he's being a rude douche. But I'm not saying that she's wronged him either. I just think it's understandable to question something like this when you're not with that person.
ohmandapants 17
I agree that it's odd, but in a way it really makes me question what happened between them that would get that response from him, if anything happened at all. Maybe he's just paranoid, maybe he has good reason...
glabberfasted 16
I'd say a paternity test is a very reasonable request. While you may be certain that he is the only possible father, he is in no way obligated to trust your word for it. Especially since you two are no longer together. Seems like an easy solution to me.
LuluRichards 20
Ugh what a prat. You and your unborn child deserve so much better! I hope it works out for both of you