Let's drink and be merry, but don't be upset if I see more than one view on a topic. I don't like people who freak out about proper grammar. I'm not religious. I love seafood. I love local beer and wine and moonshine. It creeps me out that people are putting half naked pictures of themselves all over internet. I love mushrooms.
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
By Anonymous - /
Sunday 13 September 2009 09:27 /
United States
Today, I found out my husband has a fake Facebook account that he uses to add guys and live a double life as some kind of "gamer chick". This would be disturbing enough, even if he hadn't used pictures of me to give a face to his alter ego. FML
By Little Miss Fucket - /
Friday 13 June 2014 21:07 /
United States - Fort Worth
Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML
By Anonymous - /
Wednesday 11 June 2014 22:20 /
United States - Barnhart
Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML
By outsmartedbykids - /
Wednesday 28 May 2014 16:28 /
United States - Lake Mills
Today, at school, I got seated in front of the resident creepy kid that everyone stayed away from. I was pretty relieved to get through most of the class with no incidents, until the bell rang and he tore out a chunk of my hair, yelling "DNA! DNA!" FML