By Oops - 26/09/2011 15:35 - United Kingdom

Spicy
Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 952
You deserved it 7 844
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Top comments

CryMoreFMLs 14

Fun Sized: Not so fun for everybody. Warning: Funsized might be too small to handle.

420 6
every1luvsboners 11

It was tucked into his shoe. It's an old trick so that it doesn't fall out of his pants leg and drag on the ground.

321 9

Comments

CryMoreFMLs 14

Fun Sized: Not so fun for everybody. Warning: Funsized might be too small to handle.

420 6
tpreston 0

Funsized is no fun, kingsized is fun!!!

18 65
ThreeSheetsGone 12

He won't be sending OP to the Milky Way with that Baby Ruth any time soon. *Snickers*

207 3
melchibr_fml 0

Who says this has anything to do with size? Maybe we should blame this on OP because she might not actually know where the package is located.

75 6
CuteDumBlonde64 11

Size deosn't matter :) *wisper* Thats what people with small DING-DONGs say. LOL

13 78
flockz 19

size matters. does that mean i have a big ding dong? personally i like twinkies more.

50 2
christyxbee 15

How does anyone not know where a penis is located? Iol!! Poor girl.

15 48
Damn_Hippster 11

OP, try to add water!

29 1
every1luvspuns 0

sounds like a small issue. or should i say.. small TISSUE ;)

9 74
flockz 19

thats utterly disgusting.... the mere thought of an udder spewing shit petrifies me.... *shivers*

51 3
tona01 16

The last girl to tried to find the package, laughed and told OP's boyfriend to please take her home (hopefully someone will remember)

34 1
aftertheriot 0

110- don't worry I see what you ******* did there

13 2
ThreeSheetsGone 12

No 114, I am not, and thus missing out on 100 Grand to spend on a Bit O Honey to slide my Butterfinger into.

24 1
thorscope 0

Either op is a dumbass or their boyfriend is huge!!!

0 9
deadrising084 1

30-It's not the size of the ship, it's the motion of the ocean! xD bill engvall quote

5 5
CryMoreFMLs 14

Most thumbs up comment for me! Even more then a comment which had the words "cum on" in it...

4 5
a_nutritionist 10

...doesnt this happen to every couple at some stage? its placed awkwardly so you dont notice it, especially when wearing layers or having bulky clothes. usually its fallen between your legs or is along the ridge of your abdominal muscles lining your pelvis. bring on the pointless comments about my size now children.

4 0
Gvil_Eenius 0

Is that what you keep getting told.... Noob

0 0
ck11_fml 1

"Hon... why are you rubbing my elbow?"

5 0
Franklin24 3

Or he doesn't have one but you never know

1 0
daemonsparta 16

if size matters that just proves how loose you are.

0 0
PandaMan26 11

More like f his life!

173 3
imcutefml 0

That depends on how much of a difference there is between aroused and unaroused

45 2
False_Stupidity 41

Very true, for some guys there's a very big difference between the shrunk size and erect size.

35 0
tylersign 11

Maybe he just got back from swimming!

20 2
flockz 19

and then drying off in a freezer.

27 0
imcutefml 0

Like for me there is a very big difference... So this isnt that much of an FML/FHL

0 0
tweetbaby14 18

Why f his life? She's the one who didn't try HARD enough.

2 1
jefffluffingham 5

youre going to the special part of hell for people who make dick jokes. we should get a beer when we're there. not really an FML or YDI. just because its small when its not hard... and maybe you couldnt find it for some other reason.

3 0
tweetbaby14 18

Meh, what's wrong with hell? It's hot all year round.

0 0
BALLAkid101 3

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

10 53
CryMoreFMLs 14

109 - Way to bring up one of my fav FMLs. What about it?

16 1
every1luvsboners 11

It was tucked into his shoe. It's an old trick so that it doesn't fall out of his pants leg and drag on the ground.

321 9
flockz 19

thank you boners!! now everyone will know why i walk around with clown shoes on. and they thought it was because i had a choice...

53 2
hail_this_villai 0

Is it normal I immediately wondered what different terrain would feel like across my penis as I was skipping pronouncedly? Especially a moon bounce...

25 1
CaptainPickles72 18

Forget tucking it into your shoe. Use that thing as a scarf, that's what I do! Though don't wrap it around your neck to tight or when you get a hard-on the anaconda will strangle you.

48 1
flockz 19

or the nifty belt trick. just wrap it through the belt holes of your pants. just be careful though, if you get a hard on, immediately remove it or you may or may not pass out from lack of circulation.

31 2
Bravo11 14

I haven't seen a Boners comment in forever. Almost missed this one. Nice default though.

12 0
zachherbert 10

I use the new "To Long of a Dick Trick". I pull it up my shirt, out my sleeve, and use it as a walking stick.

18 0
Fmls4life 6

That's the Boners we know and love keep it up:)

1 1
crabbyabby718 0

I've heard he uses it as a 3rd leg sometimes

1 3
ollie179 21

Don't rub too hard. You might get your finger stuck in his pussy.

267 14
screamingxpanda 5

Sorry to OP, but your comment was just too funny!!

18 5
Fx13mz 7

#7 wins comment of the day.

20 0
amandamichele 0

Hahaha best comment ever! (:

2 2
CryMoreFMLs 14

I don't really see too much of a problem about that,... But that might just be because I'm a male.... and find lesbos attrative...

0 12
tweetbaby14 18

Welcome to the wonderful world of FML.

2 0
IamMe95 5

If you want nice, watch some Disney. If you want life, go to FML :)

3 1
matt120784 0

That's what I was thinking. Too bad there isn't an option for that.

7 1
SirBedevere 0

Maybe you just have enormous hands and you've lost your sense of touch.

39 11
ally_85 1

yeah tiny penis...sad :/ don't worry tho there's someone for everyone...somewhere....

0 0