Kids: Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go...

By mikey51 - 10/03/2012 01:56 - Australia

Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 629

You deserved it 41 566

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Same thing different taste

By Niles - 20/03/2012 17:46 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was taking a shower, when my dad decided to turn off the water to the house, run upstairs, and throw a bucket of freezing cold sludge into the shower with me. He wouldn't turn the water back on for 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 374

You deserved it 2 826

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 704

You deserved it 2 757

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 287

You deserved it 7 523

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 507

You deserved it 4 958

Not now!

By Anonymous - 18/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 78

By :// - 05/11/2013 21:01 - United States - Romulus

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 753

You deserved it 3 745

By unknown - 13/12/2011 02:04 - United States

Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 366

You deserved it 3 125

By green and not with envy - 13/06/2014 20:17 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 773

You deserved it 5 797

By wowdadreally - 23/12/2014 20:46 - United States - College Station

Today, while shopping with my father, I had to use the restroom. As soon as I opened the door to the men's room, my father yelled that it was the ladies' room. I then turned around and went through the other door, where I ended up getting bitch-slapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 710

You deserved it 6 471

By fml - 20/05/2010 21:32 - Canada

Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 985

You deserved it 7 610

kut17 11

Saturday 10 March 2012 6:24

If I talked to my parents like that, I would consider getting locked in a bathroom as getting off easy.

singerlove 14

Saturday 10 March 2012 6:28

Because the dishes are SO hard to do...

Comments

mrp4nda 2

Tuesday 13 March 2012 13:55

OP probably carries the policy of "each person does his own work", in which case this FML is perfectly valid if it was his dad's mess. I love how this site is just waiting to kill people's self esteem.

yaoifreak 8

Thursday 15 March 2012 3:36

Never mess with daddy

crashley21 10

Friday 16 March 2012 17:44

Why wouldn't you just say you were taking a dump? It that's the truth then he would let it go til he knew you were finished and out of the bathroom.

jessica53139 10

Saturday 17 March 2012 5:19

Lucky I get locked in there for 6 hours

obri98 10

Sunday 18 March 2012 18:56

Pussy! Just escape out the window!

freeze101mam 5

Tuesday 27 March 2012 6:06

If I would have talked to my parents like that I would have gotten my Azz kicked, then still would have had to do the dishes.. JS

Philosofist415 3

Monday 2 April 2012 22:58

I'm afraid HE was fed up with YOUR constant shit ;)

derpies 12

Thursday 3 May 2012 3:59

Don't act with power when you don't have said power

RedneckAngel 11

Sunday 13 May 2012 5:22

Well, at least he didn't ground you...mine would have.

lilnibblit 0

Saturday 7 July 2012 8:18

I find this fml interesting because in canada at least all doors open inward to prevent getting trapped in the room so there is no way that i can think of that his dad could have wedged the door shut