Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML
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Same thing different taste
Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML
Not her fault nor mine
Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML
Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" in a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML
Weird kid
Today, my nephew kicked me in the balls, again! And he got me fair and square this time. It's the fourth time he's got me in the balls since the pandemic started. I have to put my groin guard from college on and teach him a lesson because he won't listen and he's 12, so he knows what he's doing. FML
Today, I berated my five-year-old nephew for peeing on the floor. His mom bitched me out for expecting "a little boy to have perfect aim." That's funny, it looked pretty good when he dropped his pants, looked me in the eyes, and started to piss on my rug. FML
Iron Man
Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I thought it would be funny to tell him I was Iron Man and that nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later, he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML
Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML
It's not what you think
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
Top comments
Serisent 26
If you know he doesn't like it and you did it anyway, you sort of had it coming.
Peach_assassin 8
"Today I did something wrong and suffered the consequences. FML"
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Comments (102)
Moon_Dreamer22 12
when i was a kid i loved to be tickled i still remember giggling and squirming to get away from my uncle when he did it to me, i view it as a bonding experience but that's just me, it all depends on the temperament of your tickle target
thepelvicwoo 8
YDI. I woulda reacted the same way as him!
cchuckcloninger 5
Good for him you damn bully. Only way it could be better is if he came and poured a glass of ice water over your head as you slept.
TcheQ 12
YDI. Asshole
skipper2009 18
I have no sympathy for you. YDI!
HueyMcLeon 6
hey the kid doesn't like being tickled you so had it coming
nardledangers 5
so if a kid 100% doesn't want a shot, the kid can punch the doctor? awesome! "i dont wanna take final exams!" *epic nut punch*
Labrynthian 6
GOOD! I'm glad. You KNEW he didn't like it. Guess he knew you wouldn't like getting hit the nuts. Sucks doesn't it? Punk Ass.
Sheh_fml 25
Just because he's a kid doesn't mean you can just disregard he's feeling. He doesn't like being tickled, but you did it anyway just because it would amuse you. You doesn't like being punched in the nuts, but he did it anyway - But at least he did it to teach you a lesson, not just "for fun".
Bacontree 14
I once heard someone compare being tickled when you don't like it to being raped, but you're forced to laugh. That sums up how I feel pretty well. It makes me very uncomfortable so I always tell people that if the subject arises. The fact that plenty of people see that as an invitation to start tickling me is beyond me. You totally deserved it, and don't ever tickle him again.