Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML
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Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML
Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" in a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML
Today, my nephew kicked me in the balls, again! And he got me fair and square this time. It's the fourth time he's got me in the balls since the pandemic started. I have to put my groin guard from college on and teach him a lesson because he won't listen and he's 12, so he knows what he's doing. FML
Today, I berated my five-year-old nephew for peeing on the floor. His mom bitched me out for expecting "a little boy to have perfect aim." That's funny, it looked pretty good when he dropped his pants, looked me in the eyes, and started to piss on my rug. FML
Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I thought it would be funny to tell him I was Iron Man and that nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later, he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML
Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
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Top comments
Serisent 26
If you know he doesn't like it and you did it anyway, you sort of had it coming.
Peach_assassin 8
"Today I did something wrong and suffered the consequences. FML"
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Comments (102)
julia9902 8
As a very ticklish person, i don't blame him!
sanecatlady 13
"Sonic Sez: Hey boys and girls, there's nothing like a hug from someone you like, but if you get touched in a place or a way that makes you uncomfortable, that's no good! So what do you do? You say NO! And then you tell someone you trust: a parent, a doctor, a teacher or a police officer..." Or in your case, kick you in the groin because YDI.
potater 6
don't touch people who don't want to be touched, basic human decency there. if you touch a kid who doesn't want to be touched you're teaching them that it's okay for them to do the same, when it really isn't.
TheBookWyrm 18
That little ******* bastard. Punching in the groin is cruel and unusual.
Szaszaspasz 26
Disrespecting personal boundaries is cruel and unusual as well
jh921971 10
Lesson learned?
hammie27 3
You're a moron if you don't realize the difference between these situations.
mockingjay87 4
That kid would find himself "tickled" in another way with the back of my hand.
Heathtastic 10
You totally got what you deserve OP.
Zedscar 34
AMEN! It hurts, and its not funny at all.
Mandy_Hime 6
Poor kid...I know how he feels. While I was younger, a girl kept trying to tickle me whenever she got the chance, and it didn't help she also didn't stop touching me in general. What's worse, when I lost my temper and told her to stop, she threatened to tell my mom I was being mean to her, while she was the one who started it. So yeah, all my sympathy goes to the kid here.
PrettyBlackChick 16
People: The difference is a doctor actually NEEDS to give him a shot. Being tickled doesn't prevent illness and if he doesn't like it you have to respect that.