Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML
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Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML
Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" in a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML
Today, my nephew kicked me in the balls, again! And he got me fair and square this time. It's the fourth time he's got me in the balls since the pandemic started. I have to put my groin guard from college on and teach him a lesson because he won't listen and he's 12, so he knows what he's doing. FML
Today, I berated my five-year-old nephew for peeing on the floor. His mom bitched me out for expecting "a little boy to have perfect aim." That's funny, it looked pretty good when he dropped his pants, looked me in the eyes, and started to piss on my rug. FML
Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I thought it would be funny to tell him I was Iron Man and that nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later, he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML
Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
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Top comments
Serisent 26
If you know he doesn't like it and you did it anyway, you sort of had it coming.
Peach_assassin 8
"Today I did something wrong and suffered the consequences. FML"
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Comments (102)
JMichael 25
I have to say you asked for it OP. Don't push people when they don't like something. The consequences may be dire. In your case losing your manhood.
princess51423 15
Mate, you need to teach little kids boundaries, and that their personal space is important. Creepy, OP.
daniel_2209 12
I would punch him back and say "I do", and then tickle more.
Zelphoric 25
Yeah punch a little kid... Child abuse is just great...
Quiet_one 22
When I was a kid, my dad loved to tickle me. He thought it was hilarious to hold me in place while he did it so I couldn't escape, but I did NOT. I hated it so much that for a while I actually had recurring nightmares about being tickled. My mom and I told him to stop, but he insisted it was just fun and I was enjoying it- just listen to the screams of laughter! (nope, those were just regular screams...) Finally, I got to a point where I refused to even walk near him when we were at home and that's when he realized it wasn't fun for me, and I wasn't just exaggerating. He didn't get a hug from me for months because I was terrified that he'd grab me and start tickling, and it was a long time before he completely earned back my trust. It sounds silly, and I know there are way worse things in the world, but if someone doesn't like being tickled you need to not do it (even if they are just 6 years old!).
museerux01 10
O.O this could be a horror movie...
transcedental 18
oh, honey. your comment made me sad, I just wanna hug you.. *just-an-overempathic-stranger* ;_;
Quiet_one 22
Haha, #53, thanks, but I'm fine now so no need to worry. All this was almost 2 decades ago, and now I think it's kind of funny. No lasting damage was done. :)
P1Nk13 7
I went through the same thing! Even now, tickling gives me anxiety attacks.
tjw1616 21
loooool your cousin is freakin great! good luck with your groin pain o_o
Mahendra1 9
You know he doesn't like being tickled, and you did it anyway. He knows you don't like being punched in the balls, and he did it anyway. It's hard to see how you can expect sympathy.
DanielleinDC 33
You knew the kid didn't liked to be tickled, and you did it anyway. The kid made it clear that your behavior was unacceptable with a good punch. Sorry, OP, but YDI. Maybe not in the groin, but you deserved to get a sock.
stargirl_95 24
You definitely deserved it. You need to learn how to respect people's boundaries no matter how young the person is
lipun 8
you don't mess with the kid. I understand it's fun for you, however, kids too don't like the way you don't like to be hit at groin.
steffidallasbfl 16
YDI you did it even tho you knew he's get mad