Miscellaneous: Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was...

By the_lameo_geek - 21/10/2013 02:16 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 047

You deserved it 4 048

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Same thing different taste

No one is safe

By chili - 24/07/2021 04:01

Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 333

By shitless88 - 20/08/2011 00:23 - United States

Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 866

You deserved it 4 266

By Anonymous - 16/09/2014 14:34 - United States - Wallingford

Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 073

You deserved it 3 223

Alexa, play "Ironic" by Alanis Morrissette

By irony, huh? - 20/10/2019 14:00

Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 391

You deserved it 108

By Tanner - 16/07/2011 06:23 - United States

Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 449

You deserved it 3 684

By xobeachbabi428ox - 18/07/2009 22:32 - United States

Today, I used a public bathroom. I hung my purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door and steals my purse. I got robbed while taking a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 203

You deserved it 7 981

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 162

You deserved it 54 043

Leg it

By BobbyHutchinson - 20/10/2009 15:57 - Australia

Today, someone tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested, and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves, and told a cop that I did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 952

You deserved it 2 845

Great timing

By alo1434 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 008

You deserved it 3 371

By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 21:36 - United States

Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 982

You deserved it 3 573

tygerarmy 35

Monday 21 October 2013 9:54

At least that's all you had on you. But now your Halloween costume is incomplete.

sscookie 13

Monday 21 October 2013 9:55

that could have gone a lot worse...

Comments

Wiringify 22

Monday 21 October 2013 9:54

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

tygerarmy 35

Monday 21 October 2013 9:56

With a plastic badge?

ForwardUn2Dawn 18

Monday 21 October 2013 10:13

No with one made out of wood! Yes it'd be plastic! And she'd own that shit. (Seriously no pun)

ViRepz 28

Monday 21 October 2013 15:47

Do you know the definition of pun?

the_lameo_geek 8

Tuesday 22 October 2013 3:18

Probably because I'm a short teenage girl in a TMNT shirt.

deepunder 17

Tuesday 22 October 2013 4:44

Tell them you are in deep undercover, Op

ViRepz 28

Tuesday 22 October 2013 9:19

21 Jump Street =)

tygerarmy 35

Monday 21 October 2013 9:54

At least that's all you had on you. But now your Halloween costume is incomplete.

buttcramp 21

Monday 21 October 2013 20:03

exactly!

SokDek 14

Tuesday 22 October 2013 3:10

This is perhaps the only positive side of being broke.

sscookie 13

Monday 21 October 2013 9:55

that could have gone a lot worse...

MrsDruidess 23

Monday 21 October 2013 10:54

yeah be thankful that's all you had. Think about all that we have on us 99% of the time, IDs, cells (all at we keep in those!!), credit cards, cash . . . some people still keep their social security cards (idiots)

JustBeingAwesome 22

Monday 21 October 2013 13:58

Yeah and at least they laughed it off and didn't do anything to you just because you saw they faces.

saraitkddh 47

Monday 21 October 2013 17:10

I can imagine here what you mean...

rabbitprooffence 14

Monday 21 October 2013 9:55

You should be glad you didn't have anything of value on you! Sounds to me like you were lucky!

Grand_Cookie 21

Monday 21 October 2013 9:56

Sounds better than actually valuable stuff. I'd totally rather that. They're the tards that robbed a dude for a plastic sheriff badge.

Vaimvaelk 11

Monday 21 October 2013 9:56

Should've pee'd on them

Blastoid 13

Monday 21 October 2013 10:00

Think BIG son... and browner too...!

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 21 October 2013 16:15

OP would have just gotten shot or stabbed in the ass.

the_lameo_geek 8

Tuesday 22 October 2013 3:16

I sit down to pee.

ForwardUn2Dawn 18

Monday 21 October 2013 9:58

If thats all you have then you could at least own up to it and pretend to be "the new sheriff in town." All spaghetti western like

sunnyray812 42

Monday 21 October 2013 9:59

Be thankful you didn't have anything else on you they could have taken. Even though I didn't click on the "YDI" button, you should consider yourself lucky.

Dontstealmyname 11

Monday 21 October 2013 13:09

#9 - Makes me wonder why on earth would you even talk about the YDI option? Whyy?

sunnyray812 42

Monday 21 October 2013 16:51

Because I don't think she deserved it. I didn't want anyone to think that saying she should be thankful nothing else got stolen is another meaning for YDI.