Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML
Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML
Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML
Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Today, I used a public bathroom. I hung my purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door and steals my purse. I got robbed while taking a crap. FML
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, someone tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested, and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves, and told a cop that I did it. FML
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
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Top comments
tygerarmy 35
At least that's all you had on you. But now your Halloween costume is incomplete.
sscookie 13
that could have gone a lot worse...
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Comments (58)
FML_Gecko 4
get a metal one, next time they might think twice before robbing a LEO.
KimmyCupZ 21
At least you didn't have anything more valuable on you. I would rather be laughed at than know someone has all my valuables.
brackaman 18
Who knows? Maybe that plastic security badge had OP's name, social, address, date of birth, first pet's name, etc and she just didn't mention it.
KimmyCupZ 21
Pehaps, perhaps not. We shall not know unless OP comments on said FML :)
cakefete2 31
Mugged in the bathroom?! You can tell the economy is on rough shape when you can't even take a shit in peace anymore.
lmarie1 9
I'd much rather be laughed at in this situation! Pretty lucky that you didn't have anything they were desperate for!
XxxT3rr4xxX 25
Did they give you your bag back?
JMichael 26
I'd prefer to be laughed out of a bathroom then have all my valuables stolen.
Lennox_B 8
Lol you were carrying a plastic Sherri's badge you're lucky all they did was laugh at you
brojo300 5
Why did u have a plastic badge on u?
howardom 10
So much irony here.
worldclassrager 41
Carry a knife or gun if needed? Pray that you don't need to use it...